Ruby Wax

An Announcement...

Ruby Wax | Posted 26.02.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

You can tweet, blog, bitch and bore people senseless at dinner parties on how to improve the world but really in my opinion, what has to change first, is our thinking. The conflict is in our minds and we project onto the world as if something out there is making us feel demented.

On Compassion

Ruby Wax | Posted 18.02.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

There was a feeling of waking up from a bad dream because suddenly you can clearly hear sound, taste food, smell, see, feel everything as if for the first time. I felt I was who I really am under all the fear, competition and anxiety.

Hindsight is 20:20

Ruby Wax | Posted 26.01.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

The black dog has left the building. I'm back to myself; returned to the living. I swear next time when this happens (if it happens again), I'll be more on the lookout for signs. I looked back in my diary and read what I was doing just before I had a major depression.

Learning to Be Kind to Me

Ruby Wax | Posted 07.01.2015 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

I've decided, in the deluded spirit of making resolutions in the new year, to try and change an aspect of my lifestyle; I'm going to dip my toe in the water of an attempt to be kind to myself. My problem is I can't tell when I'm being nice to myself and when am I just being a lazy pig, so I never stop with the self-flagellation to keep going. If I thought about what's the greatest thing I could do for myself, I'd tell you it was 'to never have to get out of bed'. I'm my happiest when I have a virus and have an excuse to lie there without the nagging mother in my brain screaming, "Get your ass up and out".

Digging Myself Out of the Black Hole

Ruby Wax | Posted 02.03.2015 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

I know I sound nihilistic but I do try to make peace with my pessimism. Even in childhood, my thoughts were never cuddly and warm. They were mostly unforgiving and I know no one is as cruel to me as me. I've always lobbed grenades at myself. If I try and stop, the thoughts get more persistent. The only thing I have to ease the situation is that I practice mindfulness and have done for many years. Every morning I sit in one place and it's agony because my mind is screaming for me to get up, do something...

Still Drowning, Not Waving

Ruby Wax | Posted 24.02.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

A big part of depression is the inability to 'do something,' your body's just too heavy and that 'go get' spirit is dead and gone. I realize sitting here inert that what has always pushed me in the past to achieve something is fear, sometimes I'm interested but behind that, fear.

Waiting It Out

Ruby Wax | Posted 20.02.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

I've been in the fog for about a week. In a way it feels like I've been reunited with an evil, lost relative. Someone from my past I can vaguely recognize - and then it comes to me, oh yes, it's depression. I remember now... This time it's different than any of my past episodes, At this point when I had depression in the past I'd be panicking that my old self is gone - my old personality gone and this new deader one to replace it. But even in this chaos I sort of know this is temporary, I just happen to have this disease and this loss of identity is part of it; my mind is just out of the office for a minute.

Drowning, Not Waving

Ruby Wax | Posted 16.02.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

It's hard for me to write this and come up with words and sentences because it feels like no one is at the wheel of the ship - so who's writing this? I'm pushing myself to keep going so I can remember what it looks like when it's written down and for everyone else who suffers with this to say this is not your imagination, you are not being self indulgent (I'm fighting my mind on that one). It's exactly what it says on the bottle, it's poison, terrifying and a complete mummification in nothingness.

On Depression

Ruby Wax | Posted 07.02.2015 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

So I'm sitting here now in my bedroom feeling the darkness descend blocking out all thought. At least practicing mindfulness I'm able to separate myself a little from the abusive thoughts, which are trying to bomb me to total destruction.

Staying Sane in the New World

Ruby Wax | Posted 19.01.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

I started my journey to publicise the book in New York. Everyone tells me they love New York, to me it's a gang rape on the senses. I want to confess war crimes after being kept up all night listening to trash trucks clanging. I took the subway late one night after a show, waited two hours for the right train and witnessed bedlam; feral people were howling like wolves...

Addicted to Our Own Drugs

Ruby Wax | Posted 05.01.2015 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

If after your efforts you happen to win a gold medal, trophy, bonus, hit a bulls-eye you'll get such a main line smack of dopamine you'll probably be addicted forever and spend your life hunting down the next hit at any cost. As humans we're natural born addicts when it comes to some of our neurotransmitters, such as dopamine, adrenaline, noradrenalin.

Infomania - The Newest Obsession on the Block

Ruby Wax | Posted 30.12.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

One of the first symptoms of depression is when you can't make any decisions. Choosing which direction to walk is overwhelming, looking at a menu is like going on Mastermind. Eventually your brain gives up, it has no more room, you've scored 'game over' hit your full capacity like an over stuffed hoover bag before it explodes.

I'm No Evangelist

Ruby Wax | Posted 21.12.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

Why mindfulness? I've mentioned a lot that I had a mental car crash seven years ago. I said, to quote Scarlett O'Hara (sort of), "I will never go crazy again". And so I've kept my promise to myself and haven't had an episode of depression for seven years.

Me at TEDTalks, or a Journey Into Brain Candy

Ruby Wax | Posted 15.12.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

I just got back from TEDTalks, which were held in Rio this year. It's like going to Glastonbury but the acts are geniuses who've invented things I've never dreamt possible. It's extraordinary - and the sense of "I'm not worthy" bubbles below my surface as I'm surrounded by all this brain candy.

On Happiness

Ruby Wax | Posted 24.11.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

We spend our lives hunting for something that has a very limited life span, sometimes lasting only seconds (see sex). Whatever that rush of fireworks in the blood is; winning the lottery, making a billion, getting on the volleyball team, there will be a fall. We've known this forever (see Greek tragedy) and yet we never learn.

On Stigma

Ruby Wax | Posted 10.11.2014 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

It's the only illness where you get - absolutely free with the package - a real sense of shame. I've heard people say, "I know people with real diseases, show me lumps show me X-Rays", and of course you can't so you begin to feel bombarded with self-disgust thinking," I'm not being carpet-bombed, I'm not living in a Township, how dare I, who has everything, be depressed?"

Being Human or Not

Ruby Wax | Posted 27.10.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

To be human is not in fashion these days. Successful people like to think of themselves as an extension of their digital hardware, that they are the software like the Wizard of Oz was behind the curtain, playing God... which is sadly the predicament we're in today.

On Robin Williams

Ruby Wax | Posted 20.10.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

Why is it such an 'out of the blue' experience for everyone that Robin Williams killed himself? Is it because we think if someone's funny they must spend their lives, head thrown back, wheezing away? I know very few comedians who in their real lives have their heads thrown back, it's not funny being funny; it's a killer.

Fancy Winning One of Benedict Cumberbatch's Suits? You Could Be in Luck...

Victoria Sadler | Posted 11.10.2014 | UK Entertainment
Victoria Sadler

All these items are being auctioned off to raise funds for Anno's Africa, a UK based charity whose focus is on providing creative arts education to orphans and vulnerable children in some of the biggest city slums in Africa.

Brian Cox and Me

Ruby Wax | Posted 06.10.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

I'm placed next to Brain Cox and something inside me wilts because I know I am sitting next to a superior being and he will soon find out I'm a two-celled worm... This is my trigger, if I'm near someone that smart, I tailspin into the interior pre-recorded CD made in childhood that goes something like this, "You're a total idiot and people will find out that you're an idiot."

Under Siege

Ruby Wax | Posted 30.09.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

I feel under siege, everything feels like an emergency from the fear we're on the cusp of a World War to the fact I missed my dentist appointment and he's going to charge me for it. Why am I so strung out? I'm sure in the past I wasn't this panicked...

Alone Amongst Many

Ruby Wax | Posted 16.09.2014 | UK Entertainment
Ruby Wax

I had a dinner party last week where I invited a few famous people I knew from when I did my interview shows. Many of them suffer from something I call 'movie star disease.' They live in their own time zone so when invited to dinner at seven they either come in at eleven with no apology or not at all.

Noticing Is Half The Battle

Ruby Wax | Posted 08.09.2014 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

Every morning I drag myself from sleep (it's so hard especially when I've been starring in my own dream and I've been a hit) to sitting up on my pillow to do 20 minutes of mindfulness. Every morning I think why am I doing this because when I look in at my thoughts it's never a pretty sight?

Learning to Manage Our Ancient Whispers

Ruby Wax | Posted 01.09.2014 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

In the beginning things were fine, we lived in tribes with family members. We all shared the same genes so we trusted and protected each other. The bad news about this is the bit about all being related which caused infinite mutations; some of our cousins had more fingers than needed, others had their feet growing backwards.

A Day In The Life In My Head

Ruby Wax | Posted 19.08.2014 | UK Lifestyle
Ruby Wax

Most mornings I try to drag myself into a sitting position to practice mindfulness. I do this because if I delay and say to myself, "Later," I'll never do it. My body craves to stay prone, probably forever. But sitting up and following my breath, I can check my internal weather conditions and if I don't check in, they'll unconsciously influence everything I do in the day.