I very quickly realised - mere seconds into the first routine - that this is no piece of cake. Dancing without a drink in my gut and another in my hand is not something that comes naturally to my graceless limbs.
I'm also punishing myself each morning by doing 50 naked squats in a full-length mirror so I can witness the full horror of enjoying Milk Tray for breakfast, Ferrero Rocher for lunch and Christmas cake for dinner in HD.
If more children got to see their parents exercising the child obesity rate might reduce. Most people could say they were influenced by their parents growing up, unfortunately for me my parents were not very active, which was possibly why I was always slightly overweight.
How do I lose my belly fat? How can I tone up my arms? Which exercise will shrink my thighs? The sad truth of the matter is, whether you want to get rid of that annoying lower ab pudge, firm up those pesky bingo wings or attain the elusive 'thigh gap', the answer is always the same.
'To train, or not to train?' This is the question we regular exercisers agonise over when lurgy strikes. Those unconvinced of the joy of exercise will struggle to comprehend why it is we WANT to train though the illness - why not take the opportunity to 'pull a sickie' on our fitness regimen.
People look at me with confusion when they see the amount of kale and broccoli in my trolley - five a day is not wrong but it is certainly not right either. Make it your mission to eat that and more. If you are serious about being lean, happy and healthy these are essential.
Although the Greeks are playing out a modern day tragedy, we can still learn much from their ancient past when it comes to understanding the importance and indeed relevance of exercise and staying in shape.
With so many training systems on the market, it can be very difficult to choose the right one, my suggestion is pick the one you enjoy doing the most. It has been statistically proven that people tend to stick to a routine when they enjoy doing it!
If there's one thing you're going to need as a gay man, it's a body. You can try telling me different, but nine times out of 10 you're not going to get much interest from another gay man just because you look as if you read a lot of books.