THE BLOG

Intruding On Celebrity Grief - Do We Need to See It?

28/03/2014 16:05 GMT | Updated 27/05/2014 10:59 BST

Just 10-days ago came the sad news that the beautiful L'Wren Scott had passed away. I, like many other people, was shocked and read the 'breaking news' stories as they appeared online, wondering what had happened - it's human nature, I believe, to look for answers.

However, when I saw the front pages of some of the newspapers and their respective website headlines the following day, I couldn't help but be filled with horror. The main photograph was that of L'Wren's partner, Mick Jagger, taken immediately following the news of her death, looking utterly bereft.

For anyone who has ever lost somebody they love, I'm sure you can recall the way you felt - it is a type of heart break that leaves you empty, sad, yet somehow numb to any feelings. Add to that the nature of L'Wren's passing and confusion, and both doubt and anger are thrown into the mix.

Now, I don't know about you, but if I had received that dreadful news and was promptly confronted by paparazzi snapping images of me, I don't think I would have been able to prevent myself 'doing a Britney' (or is it called 'doing a Bieber' these days?) and verbally attacking the photographers. Who would have blamed Jagger for berating them for their insensitivity? Not me, that's for sure.

I can't help but wonder, what makes it seem acceptable to encroach on somebody's personal space at such a horrendous time? What makes it acceptable to want to watch as somebody's heart breaks in front of our eyes? It's all too voyeuristic for my liking.

Whilst I appreciate that our new and modern world enables us to have the latest news and information at our fingertips no matter the time of day, plus giving us the ability to feel 'closer' to those in the public eye thanks to Facebook and Twitter etc., I can't help but feel that breaching their privacy at such an emotional moment is completely abhorrent.

Why can Jagger not grieve without the media of the world camping outside his hotel and pointing their long lenses and voice recorders at him the moment he breaches the threshold?

And this is not the only example of intrusion at an incredibly sensitive time...

Recently, the world's media has been gripped by the trial of Oscar Pistorious, the Olympic athlete accused of murdering his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp. Details of the trial are constantly updated online and photographs have been published of the accused crying, covering his ears and even vomiting into a bucket when evidence was shown to the court. As I write this now, the trial is ongoing and nobody knows what happened that fateful night, but whether it was premeditated murder or an awful accident, it must be remembered that there are people hurting - both in Oscar's family and Reeva's. The voyeuristic nature of the coverage does not sit comfortably with me.

It must be remembered that these are real people experiencing real pain and trauma. They are not stories created for our entertainment like crime dramas on television, they are somebody's real life and it seems an awful intrusion for the world to be watching, poised and hungry for more information and photographic evidence of their heart break.

Whist talking about both Mick Jagger and Oscar Pistorious' losses, I have to say the constant referral to the two ladies as "girlfriend of..." is driving me a little potty. Repeatedly headlines describe them as "Rocker Mick Jagger's girlfriend" or "Athlete Oscar Pistorius' girlfriend" yet L'Wren was a businesswoman and fashion designer, and Reeva was a successful model. Why, after their death, have they become nothing more than the partner of the person they shared their life with?

I know, as I stand here on my metaphorical soap box, nothing will change and the media will continue to thrive on the sad, the tragic and the unfortunate, but I for one wanted to voice my disgust at the trend I see developing of trespassing on other people's sadness.

Shouldn't we let them grieve in peace?