With the London lootings still fresh in our mindbrains, I am often asked for my expertise on the situation. Why? Because I am a professional rebel... and a jerk. I'm also author of the book 'Tiny Acts of Rebellion', a treatise on ways to stick it to the Man... in tiny ways. So my response to these endless queries is usually, 'please stop touching my thigh' and then this: 'The London rioters totally misunderstood my entire philosophy, but I understand why it happened'.
First, what these hoodied vagabonds did were BIG acts of rebellion, not TINY. Allow me to explain the difference. A 'big act' might be organizing an anti-war protest or a petitioning to save your favorite whale....or widespread looting. A 'tiny act', however, is much more subtle. Say you're in a supermarket and decide to buy condoms, but then a few minutes later you change your mind. Instead of putting it back on the shelf where you left it, you place them next to the nappies. Do you get it? It's tiny, it's rebellious, and it only takes a few minutes to do.
Tired of wearing jeans for Dress Down Fridays? Why not wear a Viking helmet and a chest wig instead? It's a tiny act - get it? Or why not give your Dad a Mother's Day Card ? Or give your Dad a Father's Day for Mother's Day and not give you Dad anything! These type of acts are designed to keep us sane in the busy, hectic, chaotic world in which we live. It stops us from going apeshit like that Michael Douglas character in the movie 'Falling Down'.
But just as 'tiny' acts are a byproduct of a busy lifestyle, 'big' acts are the result of an unhectic, boring and unemployed lifestyle. If you've got a lot of time on your hands, you're not going to be satisfied with yelling 'I love fudge' at a funeral. No. You're going to go after bigger game. Anger builds, people meet, people meet some more, decisions are made and boom! Next thing you know, you're fighting over some corduroy trousers in a burning Debenham's. Is it any wonder that the last big riots in Britain also occurred during a recession?
So let's remember that rebelling in our society is as about as natural as watching TV, eating porridge or beastiality. Remember when we were kids? We would sneak stuff in our Mom's shopping trolley only to find her surprised gasp at the cashier, 'Richard, what are these old lady's pants doing here?' But as we get older, we lose our edge. We get a house, a career, a mortgage,....a hemmorrhoid. We need to remind ourselves that if we don't flip off our waiter behind a menu, we're likely to explode one day and really cause trouble.
So in the final analysis, it's up to our jerkwipe governments to get the economy going because ultimately it dictates how big our rebellions will be. But on a personal level, we can do something right now. Be a 'tiny acter' before it's too late. Unbuckle that seat belt on the plane before it stops, be the last to clap at an Elton John concert, give an annoying tourist the wrong directions....It just may stop you and fifty of your friends one day from throwing rocks at a Nandos.
Rich recommends you use the hashtag #tinyacts to join the Tiny Acters