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Why Boris Isn't Going Anywhere

01/07/2016 12:05 | Updated 01 July 2016

During his resignation announcement, our sitting-duck Prime Minister passed on to his successor the butt-clenchingly terrifying task of triggering article 50. Some saw this as the final - and perhaps first - act of political genius on David's part, relieving himself of the duty of firing the U.K into an unknown future and preserving his legacy as just being that guy who handed the gun to whoever was willing to commit political suicide.

Shortly after Cameron's announcement, his assumed heir, Boris Johnson, did look uncharacteristically downbeat. His victory article in the Daily Telegraph reads less like a celebration than the dictionary definition of backtracking. And his victory speech as Brexit's de-facto leader sounded more like the regretful eulogy from a man who, staring at the corpse of Cameron's political career, saw his own on life support. He was destined for no.10, and he knew it was as good as digging his own grave.

For some, today's announcement that he won't stand for Tory leader is an unsurprising act of cowardice. It's a hit and run, where the U.K is the victim and Bozza is at the wheel. But cowards can also be driven by amibition; you only need to revisit the beginning of the brexit campaign and his pseudo-deliberations about what position to take to see that Boris is determined, for his own political gain, to be on the expedient side of history.

So it seems strange that, after Michael Gove's decision to stab Boris in the back and seize his leadership bid, many commentators have already written Boris's political obituary. It feels premature. If anything, Gove has stabbed himself in the front, and Boris is laughing. And here's why.

You may remember a politician who was around a few years' ago by the name of Nick Clegg, primarily known for promising to axe tuition fees and doing something slightly different. The public never forgave, but they forgot him, while Cameron quickly dispensed of his human shield in the following election, never receiving the punishment for his own crime.

So don't be surprised if we see history repeat itself. The stage has been set for Boris to full on Clegg Gove, or allow Gove to Clegg himself. Gove has probably already been clegged and he's too powergasmed to know any better. While poor Govey takes the bullet for whatever shitstorm follows the U.K leaving the EU, Boris can disassociate himself from the whole Brextastrophee, only to return when we've all forgotten who was driving the car.

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