Louboutin, Blahnik, Dior, Choo, Gucci... Not even their full titles, yet we all know who they are and what they are. Our inner Carrie Bradshaw hankers for a lottery win or a multi-millionaire to sweep us off our feet. We will even happily skip an evening out with the boyfriend if it meant we were saving a bit more towards that ultimate Holy Grail... new shoes!
Not everybody understands this lust for footwear. Many an hour has been spent gazing through shop windows, looking online and working out if we don't eat this month then those shoes 'will be mine'! I have no time for chunky, plain ugly 'practical' shoes. Why be practical when you can have vertiginous, pointy, platformed, lovelies at the end of your legs?
The heel-haters out there will offer "they hurt your feet", "they will damage your spine" and that it is "impossible to walk properly in them" are just a few of the classics, but they do have a point. Consultant podiatric surgeon Mike O'Neill, spokesman for the Society of Chiropodists and Podiatrists, explains: "High heels make you raise your heel and as soon as you do that your centre of gravity is pushed forward. What happens then is you bend your lower back to compensate for this and that changes the position of your spine, putting pressure on nerves in the back." Meh... I'll worry about that when it happens.
As for the 'make your foot ache' excuses, sure at the end of the day your feet do ache, but at the end of the day, who doesn't want to take their shoes off and relax? If we didn't then we would all be reclining in pyjamas and shoes. As for walking in them - it's just a matter of knowing how. Lean back a little and walk from the hips (not as crazy as it sounds - it just takes a little practice). Heels are such a big part of a woman's' life that there is even a sport dedicated to it! Glamour magazine do an annual 'stiletto race', where you have to run in your favourite pair of heels! Sign me up!
This is why we love 'those shoes', granted they are not the most stable or practical of footwear, you certainly live life on the edge when you attempt to stride down a cobbled street in a pair of stilettos. But they do make you feel good. The outfit you wear is instantly transformed into a power suit - even if it is only a T-shirt and jeans, you are taller and your stature adjusts as you gain new elevation, ultimately making your posture arrange itself to a new more confident stance. I'll leave you with a pearl of wisdom from Manolo Blahnik "Shoes are the quickest way for women to achieve instant metamorphosis."
With that, I rest my case.
Ruth Harrison Roberts will write for shoes. Or for money to buy shoes. She is still yearning for that walk-in shoe closet. Heels only.