Six Reasons Why Being Engaged (to be Married) Is Seriously Weird

All anyone wants to talk to you about is the wedding and the proposal and it's lovely but very strange because before I remember having other conversations. I even miss banal exchanges about the weather just for some variety. Although I think I have missed out on a couple of those because I was too busy staring at my ring.

I have ripped loads of tights, had to restyle my jewellery collection and I have never been so into colour schemes!

I am engaged as of 30 August 2015 and it's wonderful but it's also seriously weird. After five years with my really rather lovely fiancé I was hoping and kind of expecting a proposal. However, when it happened all I could say was "this is so weird" over and over again at the top of a volcano. I did of course remember to say yes first. It happened on Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh at the end of the Edinburgh Fringe (just the pick me up I needed) and it was very romantic and he didn't get down on one knee and he just said "Sam will you marry me" and I said "are you joking" whilst getting a bit teary. There, that should be all your initial questions dealt with. Now for the six reasons why all this is seriously weird:

1. I can no longer use my left hand

Photo credit: Samantha Baines

I love my engagement ring (above) and sometimes I just gaze at it because it's so sparkly but it's also ruined my knowledge of my left hand. I suddenly have something on a finger that I have never had anything on before and whilst you might be thinking "oh boo hoo you what a hard life you lead" may I add that it makes everyday tasks difficult in a host of new ways. I have ripped countless pairs of tights because the ring catches on them both when I am wearing them and when I am putting them on. I used to sleep with my hand under my pillow and now the ring digs into my skin and hurts so I have had to change position. Even with things like tucking a top into my trousers, the ring gets caught above or below the waist band. It's basically like a new knuckle has been added to my hand and my body can't seem to get to grips with this extra appendage. Stressful.

2. Could we talk about the weather

photo credit: Eclairs via photopin(license)

All anyone wants to talk to you about is the wedding and the proposal and it's lovely but very strange because before I remember having other conversations. I even miss banal exchanges about the weather just for some variety. Although I think I have missed out on a couple of those because I was too busy staring at my ring.

3. Wedding Fairs happen

Photo credit: Samantha Baines

We went to The National Wedding Show and thank you to the organisers who gave us VIP treatment, which we totally needed because a lot of obsessed people go to wedding shows. The queues around the discounted wedding dress areas are like the queues outside an Apple store when a new iphone is released. Although this queue had better accessories: namely tiaras and veils. Wedding shows are intense, go with a plan because going to browse isn't a good plan. You will be trampled. Decide what you have in place eg. venue and what you still need eg. photographer, invites, entertainment and hit those stands. At fairs like The National Wedding Show you will find some brilliant companies for your wedding but be focused. Also, one of the strangest things about wedding shows is that all the wedding bands perform so its like being in a room with fifty radios playing at once and some of the radios are dressed in sequins.

4. Thank you cards

I suddenly have a new found love and appreciation for everyone who has ever organised a wedding. There is so much and I mean so much to think about! I have found wedding checklists on the internet but they all have different things to check off which means I currently have four separate check lists to think about. Also I knew weddings were expensive but this is a whole new level of expense on an event - I could make my own feature film instead! I am considering sending thank you cards to all the married people I know to thank them for having me at their stressful and expensive weddings but it would add to my stationary budget which is already ridiculously high: can you invite people to a wedding via word of mouth?

5. Introductions are ruined

photo credit: IMG_0394 via photopin(license)

The word fiancé is just weird. It is so flouncy and coming out of my London mouth just makes it sound like my tongue has had a spasm. I think you can only truly use the word fiancé if you are in a Noel Coward play or Katie Price - she must have got used to saying it by now. I am so aware of this word and the fact I feel ridiculous saying it that when I talk about or introduce my fiancé I leave a pause before the word to prepare myself. So basically everyone thinks I am re-considering the engagement because I can't bring myself to say that he is my fiancé. Can we come up with a new word please? Husband to be? My promised (that one works for Downton Abbey surely)?

6. Budget nightmares

Last night a woke up in a sweat because we had missed the wedding bands off the excel spreadsheet entitled 'budget' and I said this aloud to my fiancé at 2am. That is totally true and my wedding is over a year away. I fear for my family and friends over the next year if I don't get any proper sleep due to budget nightmares. I am not a happy bunny when I am tired, or hungry or in pain, or thirsty. So family and friends stock up on water, painkillers and food.

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