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Scott Capurro

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Defending Jimmy Savile

Posted: 17/12/2012 00:00

Firstly, might I remind everyone his last name is spelled with one 'L', not two? I've seen Jimmy's surname misspelled in print several times, and that's an abuse glorious bookworms, like those who peruse the pages of The Huffington Post UK, should not tolerate.

Nor should the reader tolerate child abuse, unless it's an integral part of a fictional story, the way some of these allegations against Jimmy Savile seem to be. Yes, he was egomaniacal, and yes, he liked the attention of young women, which, even more than his banal jokes, made him an average comic. But a pedophile? Where's the proof? Where are the leather shorts? He did have a mullet, which puts him one lap dance closer to being a fiddler, so glam rockers beware!

And everyone else, really. Years ago, in the hallowed, and, if you believe rumours, rapacious halls of the BBC, a notoriously combative Australian lady leaned in and whispered we're all paedophiles, we all like youth and beauty, but some of us take it a step too far. If by 'a step too far', she meant Savile, I never asked. I was too busy rummaging through my own memories, wondering how I'd managed to slip through the net when black boys on skateboards make me perspire and stare. But I realised I'd never approach a black boy, because my face is my calling card and my nose job cost five grand.

What makes me even more nervous than a beating is a trial in absentia. Savile cannot face his accusers. They're all too old to hold his interest, and anyway he's dead. One wonders why, if the pain they allegedly withstood was so great, the suffering so unmanageable, they didn't indict Savile before he passed away? His 'victims' were, as we've all heard, terrified of his power. But everyone was afraid of Savile. He was creepy! Lude, lascivious, lecherous, these were the staples of TV presenters in the '70s. So why is Savile being crucified for most men's slightly groping, misplaced, but ultimately harmless affections? What's in a peck on the cheek, other than a potential tongue? Isn't a hand on the knee just a simpler way of saying 'me likey'?

The public's appetite for disgraced celebrities seems to end at the Royals. No one minds that Prince Harry was just recently spending taxpayer money in Vegas, manhandling women who were possibly petrified, surrounded brutally by hangers on and bodyguards. Even if these ladies were being paid to attend to Harry's every need, including, I might add, his ginger pubes, which, in my own case, would require more money than that pale c*nt can wrangle, they might have felt violated, exposed. Not only has Harry's mishandling of his office been praised, the Royals, a bevy of inbred, cowardly, bigoted, bloated, underachieving Germans, are more popular than ever.

One might surmise that Savile is being raked over the coals for his commonness. A Northerner, a Catholic, a coal miner, he was eventually knighted, and, somewhere along that uphill grind we call show, made enemies. His ostentatious cigar smoking sickened Oxbridge graduates at the Beeb, as he blew holes 'round their starched shirted, constipated snobbery. Savile might now be on trial for his lower class origins, for being popular, successful and a Eurovision supporter. But perhaps his only real crime was his unwillingness to cut his hair.

Perchance he was young at heart, and the only people he felt didn't judge him negatively were the little ones. Children offer unconditional love, he felt at home with them, and they are flirty. They always look back.

If Jimmy was inappropriate with kiddies, conceivably the pressure of fixing everything left him damaged. That kind of responsibility made Jesus gay, and Mohammed illiterate, but unlike them, Jimmy was human and couldn't live without a sensitive touch. Maybe we're all to blame for ignoring the man, and praising the idol.

I'm aware this is a careful subject, and to the victims, if they exist, might I offer these words of illumination: At least you were chosen. I spent twelve years in Catholic school, and those priests never came near me.

That is a crime I'll have to die with.

 

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Firstly, might I remind everyone his last name is spelled with one 'L', not two? I've seen Jimmy's surname misspelled in print several times, and that's an abuse glorious bookworms, like those who per...
Firstly, might I remind everyone his last name is spelled with one 'L', not two? I've seen Jimmy's surname misspelled in print several times, and that's an abuse glorious bookworms, like those who per...
 
 
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05:43 PM on 12/27/2012
The author component seems even less credible than comic and actor attributed to Mr Capurro given that he kicks off with a paragraph on the spelling of Savile's surname yet later laughably (that must be the comic element) fails to correctly spell lewd. Irrespective, the piece as a whole is abysmal.
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Scott Capurro
09:07 PM on 12/27/2012
Irony is dead, and you have zero fans.
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Reith
what's a micro-bio?
07:20 PM on 12/23/2012
It's too early to damn Jimmy Savile. He was never part of my scene so I have no idea of what this is really about. I have no evidence. Scot, your article will inevitably attract protesters fired up by the media rather than actual evidence that still seems in very short supply.

It was the same with the Michal Jackson trial. After some highly invasive journalism on behalf of a Brit, Martin Basher, (a nice example of how to start media frenzy), Jackson was indicted for conspiracy to commit child abduction, false imprisonment, extortion' child molestation, attempted child molestation, and giving alcohol to an underage person to facilitate molestation.

The media pronounced him guilty. He lost fans in droves apart from a very few. His career was wrecked utterly. And then came Thomas Mesereau. Little by little the evidence was examined and discredited. Of course, Jackson was acquitted on all counts. But the damage had been done. Surely many posters here remember the case. It was only 7 years ago and was re-enacted almost verbatim on the box.

I don't like the look of Savile but I'd prefer justice to the opposite.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Scott Capurro
06:01 PM on 12/23/2012
I've spent the weekend writing a piece questioning the use of guns and gay gyms, but I'm not sure some of you infidels are worth the trouble.
Remember, to some good Christians, Christmas isn't the same without a bit of sacrifice and discomfort. Imagine the pains Jesus suffered, pussy and oozing on the cross, going into a diabetic coma for your sins, and you might grasp my own suffering.
I do hope some of you receive a comedy cap under the tree. When reading my column, wear it in good health, with an open heart and mind, or choke on your vomit, thus removing, however small, society's abusive excess.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Dave Thompson 451
Under every stone lurks a politician.
12:09 AM on 12/23/2012
His pattern of behaviour seems to have been heel bent on targeting the vulnerable. Not the process usually followed by the innocent.

Believe whatever you choose about "Jimmy", however unlikely, given the range of evidence. I always thought he was creepy.

I'm utterly astonished there was no "in family" theme to his perversion, but either this still remains hidden or these actions developed following the increase of opportunity in his career.
11:25 PM on 12/22/2012
He wasn't a groper, he was a rapist.

And lots of them did speak up, or tried to: they weren't believed, and the others learned from their mistake.

I've never heard of you, and I guess I won't be looking out for your funny entertaintments.
12:01 AM on 12/23/2012
Lots of assertions and defamation, and as usual nothing to back them up except hearsay. Where are your forensics? Where are your witnesses? Where is your evidence that the police did not thoroughly investigate allegations made against Savile when he was ALIVE? Why should hundreds of 'victims' who are seeking MILLIONS in compensation be believed now? Why is that 'victims' of historic alleged abuse haven't moved on with their lives and how will money help them do so? So many unanswered questions and no answers.
10:12 AM on 12/22/2012
Is this meant to be funny? 3 minutes of my life I'll never get back.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Scott Capurro
05:52 PM on 12/23/2012
But it took me 5 minutes to write, imagine how I feel. Or can you? Imagine?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
oldstuff
Your micro-bio is empty!
01:13 AM on 12/21/2012
wtf are you rambling on about? offensive and moronic.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Scott Capurro
05:54 PM on 12/23/2012
Abbreviations are insulting. What are you actually trying to express?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
oldstuff
Your micro-bio is empty!
09:29 PM on 12/23/2012
that you think you're too clever by half.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
seanwhite06
Well have the 'courtesy' to tell me why it does no
02:40 PM on 12/20/2012
But this is the hypocrisy of 'our' society - too many of us are prepared to conveniently give moral outrage to situations like this, but when it comes to "putting our money where our mouth is" and paying for these services, to put practical checks to prevent these incidences, and protect children and young people... then we are less than enthusiastic.

And the country "can" most definitely afford it. But the millionaires in our Government Cabinet & Ministers, and those privileged number who financially support them, and influence decisions - choose largely not to.
03:13 AM on 12/19/2012
Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but in my opinion, this article highlights why so many children and adults stay silent about abuse. The prospect of being disbelieved and blamed, as well as the fear of having traumatic experiences disregarded or minimised, is certainly enough to maintain that silence you seem to question.
12:28 PM on 12/19/2012
However it seems that many adults are only traumatised and silent until their alleged abuser is dead and unable to dispute their claims - then, apparently, everyone should believe them and nobody should blame them, even though their silence could have allowed continued abuse to others. Odd that.
02:13 PM on 12/19/2012
Wow....that reply must have taken a lot of thought. Victim blaming is a quick and easy response to a complex problem. Well done, you must be proud for that deep insight.
04:15 PM on 12/19/2012
The fact that their silence could have allowed further abuse to others is beside the point; when you are that terrified of someone the safety of others you don't know is far less important than simply getting through another day.

Perhaps you'd like to spend years being terrorised, beaten and raped before speculating on how much blame is to be laid at the feet of those who have been through absolute hell and back at the hands of someone else for no other reason than they suited his tastes.

If the abuser is dead then there can be no punishment for doing the one thing you have been told is the ultimate offence.
05:58 PM on 12/18/2012
An excellent article but don't be surprised if there are people out there who cut and paste bits of it to create some pompous nonsensical response, citing media conjecture as if it was proven fact, and exposing their own insecurity in the process.
04:22 PM on 12/19/2012
We wouldn't have to cut and paste if the author hadn't given us so much to work with.

"At least you were chosen. I spent twelve years in Catholic school, and those priests never came near me. That is a crime I'll have to die with."

With a line like that we don't actually have to say anything much; he's done it for us.
07:26 PM on 12/19/2012
No but you need to be able to recognise a joke in future.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
alamb60210
05:10 PM on 12/18/2012
You call yourself a “comic, actor and author”. Most, if not all, professional comics know there are certain red lines that should not be crossed, particularly relating to recent traumatic news stories.

You have crossed that red line. And some of your statements are so offensive in their innuendos that I am surprised you have been allowed to publish your article. “Children offer unconditional love, he felt at home with them, and they are flirty”. “... and to the victims, if they exist, might I offer these words of illumination: At least you were chosen. I spent twelve years in Catholic school, and those priests never came near me.”

Those words are unforgivable. There are many people who, as vulnerable children without families or anyone else to turn to, were taken advantage of by this man, who had friends in high places and any amount of money to buy the silence of those who could have put a stop to the abuse. Their trauma will remain with them for the rest of their lives....and you think this is funny?
04:58 PM on 12/18/2012
One of the best articles I've seen on HP. Keep it up and let's have more from Scott, please.
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loulou11
06:10 AM on 12/19/2012
Are you related to Scott or do you secretly fancy him?
12:31 PM on 12/19/2012
I said let's have more from Scott.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Dave Thompson 451
Under every stone lurks a politician.
12:13 AM on 12/23/2012
Agent?
04:11 PM on 12/18/2012
HP. Much respected though you are, you got this one wrong.
A poorly written piece by a shockjock.
PLEASE do demean yourselves by leaving this up.
Not worthy.
12:35 PM on 12/18/2012
Not funny.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Scott Capurro
05:49 PM on 12/18/2012
This is a VERY serious subject, not meant to be funny. I might inform the officials about your remark, do you live alone with any children?
08:43 PM on 12/18/2012
So you feel the need to threaten me because I have a viewpoint?
02:54 PM on 12/19/2012
Scott - Do not delete this comment again!
Is this comment "This is a VERY serious subject, not meant to be funny" a joke?
If not, you are stating that you believe children are flirty.
Anyone who holds this belief should not be alone with children.
11:44 AM on 12/18/2012
"I'm aware this is a careful subject, and to the victims, if they exist, might I offer these words of illumination: At least you were chosen. I spent twelve years in Catholic school, and those priests never came near me."

Quite clear you're not aware it's a careful subject and nowhere near enough of a good enough comedian to carry this off with the flair that would be required. Luckily most comedians wouldn't have the poor taste to try yet. Poor effort.