Infidelity in long-term, monogamous relationships is often inevitable. Don't get me wrong, for some people monogamy works, it's natural, it's fine. Good for them. But for an awful lot of people it's a Herculean task, a constant struggle with the self, a battle against all bodily instincts.

"My place or yours?" He slurred. "You said you had a wine cellar" I replied, already hailing a cab. And thus I woke up in his well appointed South London bachelor pad, still wearing my dress but only one of my six-inch long diamond drop earrings.

The controversial truth is that the state of marriage - and, more importantly, the monogamy it entails - isn't really working for most people in today's society... the sad reality is that many people simply cannot live up to the expectations of life and sex with a single partner.

Now, more than at any other time, we need to adopt a more flexible approach to coupledom. Yet as the world allows for increasingly autonomous lifestyles, we tighten the reins on our spouses.

This week I was interviewing long-term happy bachelors for a women's magazine on the rise of singledom. When I say long-term, I mean willingly long-term. Not the spluttering, nervous, perspiring ones who hang around speed dating events desperate to find a girlfriend.