Something Kind Of Beautiful

11/09/2017 14:30 BST | Updated 11/09/2017 14:31 BST

Something kind of beautiful happened this morning.

Joseph had his usual early start (05:53 approx) and crawled into bed at the side of me. As it was still dark, he did his usual trick of feeling my face and putting his fingers at the corners of my mouth to check whether I was smiling; I wasn't. I knew I would be instructed to smile so I did my best fake smile so I wouldn't have to talk. It appeased him and he cuddled in close and cocked his leg over my bladder. God loves a leg cocker doesn't he?

Over the next couple of minutes he wasn't fidgeting as he usually does and his breathing seemed to change. Was it possible that for the first time in eight years he had fallen asleep at the side of me?

I coudn't see his eyes despite my best squint and considered gently touching them to check, but I was certain I'd poke him in the eye. I wondered whether I would be able to get back to sleep myself and take advantage of this beautiful rare moment. I realised the pressure on my bladder and my potentially dead arm would prevent this and I said fourFuck My Life's in my head.

The temptation was there to try and lean across and grab my phone to capture this Instagram worthy moment, whilst trying to keep my own Lion King v Spaghetti Head out of the picture, but I knew the slightest movement could ruin it.

Instead, I laid there desperate for the toilet and my arm going numb appreciating this joyous occasion for three whole minutes before Joseph suddenly opened his eyes and told me "PAY ATTENTION". I told him I was and he climbed out of bed, stood there proudly announcing "I'm golfing" and showed me a magnificent golf swing.

He doesn't play golf.

Our lives are full of glorious, random moments and today I am thankful for those three beautiful minutes and weekend lie-ins.

You'll have to make do with an old picture.

IMG_1304

Tina is mum to a 9 year old boy Joseph who has autism. She recently won the Bloody Awesome Parents (BAPS) SEND Newcomer blogger award. She likes to give an honest (often sweary) account of their lives dealing with autism. You can follow her here on facebook or her blog here.