03/10/2010 22:31 BST | Updated 22/05/2015 10:12 BST

Strop Of The Week: Shoe Lace Drama

Strop Scene:

2.40pm. Torrential rain. Late for appointment. Forgot umbrella. Outside the "Child Free Zone Cafe". I kid you not.

Strop Cause:

Shoe laces becoming undone and a sudden burst of hitherto seldom demonstrated Independence regarding the tying of said laces.

Strop Symptoms:

Increasing in volume at an alarming rate:

"I want to do it. No leave me I want to do it on meown." Attempt to assist worsened situation. Screaming abdabs followed.

Stropper hasn't learned to tie her laces yet. This could take some time. Getting very very wet. Glancing in at cafe where jolly, smiling, carefree, child free, dry, latte sipping couples stare out at us, clearly wondering where the lines of demarcation are with respect to "Child Free".

Strop Solution:

"Shall we find a shop that sells Smarties?"
I know, I know.

Dismay Factor Percentage:

Pretty damn high mainly due to location and the dripping of water down the back of neck. Also made substantially worse by the feeling of parental failure.
I'd say 95%

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