08/04/2011 12:47 BST | Updated 22/05/2015 10:12 BST

Food &Amp; The City: On Going Cold Turkey

I lied and I was full of crap.

What I did not mention last week was that my corporate retreat was a five day holistic detox retreat. Having written the week before that I would never give up coffee, I did for a week, and the cold turkey was both head splitting and mind altering.

After spending years repeating unhelpful patterns, I decided to further my qualifications as the world's first gastro therapist by spending the past three and a half years working with wonderful facilitators on a quest to find out who I really am, and why I am who I am. How much of our behaviour is nature, and how much is nurture? Or in some cases not being nurtured? The more I questioned, the more answers I got, the more answers I got the more hurt and confused I felt. It is a really odd thing to be given clear and considered answers by professional facilitators to life's unanswered questions; but when those long awaited answers come, they are resolute but none the less strangely un-satiating. Having a clear answer to why we taste certain emotions does not make them any easier to swallow and digest, let alone release.

I went away because all this research had given me emotional indigestion and there were no Rennies powerful enough to unblock the plug of profound emotions decaying within. Soldiering through a curates egg of a life can release some unappetising by products, some common ones being, hurt, resentment, shame, anger and fear etc.

In my quest for answers I experienced highs and lows and many delicious and exhilarating breakthroughs; after all I would not be writing to you now had it not been for the rough times, but I had reached a point where having assimilated the whole box of frogs, I was stuck and slightly fearful. I had the answers but I could not find the acceptance or true forgiveness my facilitators were encouraging me to find, and somewhere in the back of my throat like the everlasting gobstopper from hell, past hurt gradually began to taste like resentment and anger and it was not long before I felt like I was choking on the incapacitating taste of fear.

They say that RESENTMENT, is the poison you drink, hoping someone else will die[t] and that ACCEPTANCE, means you stop waiting for a happy past[a].

With no more questions to ask, I was grateful for the answers but it was now definitely time to move on. I would use their nutritious content to grow and expel the rest, and what better way to do that than a transformational life changing experience? Having spent a lifetime swallowing, the idea of going on a juice fast was totally appealing. The advertisement promised that this mind and body detox would send me home cleansed and transformed. Transformation, mental clarity and loose jeans, a win win scenario in any ones book.

And so it was. I arrived at Simply Healing feeling like a slug, and left believing I am a butterfly. The combination of being alone and introspective coupled with holistic treatments and colonic hydrotherapy (that is when you see how much crap you have swallowed in your lifetime), herbal supplements and freshly made juices, the straight talking High Priestess of detox Vivien Kay emptied me of all that past hurt and subsequent emotions and led me to a new beginning...

It is not so much about what you lose in a holistic detox programme, but what you gain.

I look and feel wonderful and everyone has noticed my new wings! The good news is that Vivien has said I can have one coffee a day and as I sip my first coffee in a week, looking at the blossom in the street, life is good and I am buzzing with energy and optimism.

There are many detox programmes around the country, check out customer feedback to ensure you end up in a safe place. If you want to do it at home there is Jason Vale and his juices and there are even some home delivery companies.

Note: It is advisable to consult your doctor before undertaking a detox programme.

Simply Healing West Sussex: Mini weekend recovery starts from £245.00, well worth the financial sacrifice in the interest of self-preservation.