Banker Jokes: When Lloyds Sent Its Managers To Comedy School

Who's Having The Last Laugh? Lloyds Sends Its Bankers To Comedy School

Lloyds Bank's team building initiative to send bank managers to comedy school is a controversial move when many think bankers have already had the last laugh.

Dislike for financiers has skyrocketed since the recession, with bankers being the butt of many a credit crunch joke.

Even Business Secretary Vince Cable admitted to having a less than loving thoughts about them recalling the age old banker joke:

"What's the difference between a dead cat on the motorway and a dead banker on the motorway? There are skidmarks around the cat."

Lloyds is partly owned by taxpayers after being bailed out during the financial crisis. The two day workshop at The Comedy School is hoped to promote leadership and communication skills, as part of a six month training scheme for managers at the banking giant.

The Comedy School in London usually teaches in prisons and on charity projects and many will scoff at the course proposed to help senior managers "get out of their comfort zone".

The new chief executive of Lloyds, Antonio Horta-Osorio, raised eyebrows in November when he was signed off work with extreme fatigue and stress with his annual salary package being worth around £8.3million.

With the antics of bankers once more proving grimly laughable, Huffington Post UK rounds up some of the best banker jokes.

  • Ed Aczel: What's the difference between a no-claims bonus and a banker's bonus? You lose your no-claims bonus after a crash.
  • Scott Charlton's banker jokes for which he was booed off stage at a Nationwide party were reported in the Metro:
    • My son asked me if prostitutes had children. I said of course they do, where do you think bankers come from.
    • I think they should put blood banks and sperm banks in local bank branches. We already know they are run by bloody w*****s.
    • I got an insurance policy from Nationwide and it was just like a hospital gown. You think you're covered....
    • I wanted to be a banker until they found out my mum and dad were married when I was born.

  • @BankerJokes To diversify their income streams, Wall St Bankers are considering investing in the lucrative Tablet device market.Their first device will be geared mainly towards financial professionals working on Wall St. It will be called the iRob.
  • @angelo2711 Man on deathbed to spouse: bring me a lawyer & banker: Why? I want pass like Jesus, with a thief on either side of me
  • A banker, a school teacher, a Tory MP and a Daily Mail reader are sat around a table. In front of them is a plate, upon which there are ten biscuits. The banker scoffs nine of the biscuits. The Tory then turns to the Daily Mail reader and whispers in his ear: "Watch out, that teacher is after your biscuit".
  • Why don't sharks attack bankers? Professional courtesy.
  • Jimmy Carr: The Greeks have a new prime minister. He's a banker. You know it's bad when they stop even bothering to pretend the bankers aren't in charge
  • Bankers never die...They just lose interest.
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