28/06/2012 08:17 BST | Updated 24/07/2012 11:53 BST

How To Cheat - And Win - At School Sports Day

Sports Day: the two words guaranteed to divide the general populace by either striking fear into their hearts or fill souls with competitive spirit and dreams of gold.

But for the former - who weren't born natural Olympians - there are ways of being able to hold your head up high without putting in months of gruelling training, protein shake dieting or devising cunning tactics and holding team talks.

So, for your convenience, we have collated a few ideas of how to save face without pulling a muscle.

And remember: it's the (ahem) taking part which counts....