George Osborne's reading of the 2013 Budget did not go to plan, with MPs roaring in outrage, the Chancellor developing a squawking cough and a leaky press dripping the details out early.
So how many coughs, claws and mentions of "aspiration nation" did it take the Chancellor to read his speech?
Major Press Leaks x 1: Labour attempted to throw Osborne off course, with a copy of the leaked budget on the front page of the Evening Standard on their laps.
Two x Global Race: Global race, the pet phrase of our dear old PM, was mentioned merely twice and strivers and skivers (thankfully) failed to make an appearance.
THINGS CAN ONLY GET BITTER, read the ES's headline
Three x Sit downs: Osborne was forced to sit down three times throughout his speech as the rowdy jeers of the chamber drowned out his statement.
Four x Coughs: As the deputy speaker called for order, it all got too much for Osborne, whose voice squeaked out of existence, forcing an embarrassing splutter, much to the glee of the opposition.
Eight x Pointy finger waggle: Though the pointy finger waggle also made an appearance (unleashed more than eight times) it was indeed his claw-like appendage that stole the show, winking its evil promise, an aspirational 17 times.
10 x Aspiration: "Aspiration nation" was the buzzword of the speech, which together with aspire and aspiration was mentioned an ambitious ten times. However his cough prompted some speculation on Twitter whether "Asphyxiation Nation" was perhaps not more apt.
Though #aspirationnation quickly trended on the social media site, Ed Miliband weighed in with his own hashtag for beleaguered Osborne: #downgradedChancellor, which soon dominated the list of trends. Yes it really has come down to the battle of the hashtags.
17 x evil claws: Osborne was unabashed, and ignoring the jeers, soldiered on, paving the way for the real champion of the budget speech, Osborne's "evil claw."
The Evil Claw is unleashed on the opposition
An example of the more casual claw, as Pickles attempts to rein in one of his chins
We've seen this beauty before, unleashed when Osborne needs to make a particularly pernicious point.
The claw bathed in the glory of the Union Jack flag, is especially evil-looking