19/01/2015 07:18 GMT | Updated 26/01/2015 06:59 GMT

This Stone Penis Is 28,000 Years Old And Was (Probably) Used As Dildo In The Ice Age

MICHAEL LATZ via Getty Images
SCHELKLINGEN, Germany: Archaeologist Petra Kieselbach of Germany holds a 28,000 years old stone phallus which has been discovered in a cave in Baden-Wuertemberg in southern Germany, during a press conference in Schelklingen 25 July 2005. In assembling 14 stone fragments, found last year in the Hohle Fels cave, archeologists rebuilt the phallus, which is 20 centimeters (eight inches) long and three centimeters wide. AFP PHOTO DDP/MICHAEL LATZ GERMANY OUT (Photo credit should read MICHAEL

If Ann Summers had been around during the Ice Age, this is definitely the kind of penis-shaped paraphernalia they'd be selling.

Ladies and gentleman, we give you one of the oldest (and most durable) sex toys in existence...

It's eight inches long, three centimetres wide and is as hard as, well, a rock.

stone phallus

While the stone phallus was found nearly a decade ago, its photograph is doing the rounds on social media again - after all, what's ten years to a 28,000-year-old dildo, eh?

It was discovered buried in a cave in the Swabian Jura, a German mountain range, back in 2005 and has been tickling the imagination of historians, archaeologists and nosey parkers (like you and me) ever since.

According to Professor Nicholas Conard of the University of Tübingen, the multi-purpose penis would've been used as a symbolic representation of male genitalia as well as for "knapping flints".

While it might sound like a sexual innuendo, knapping flints actually involves banging two rocks together to shape stone in order to manufacture tools. Not so sexy, huh?


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As you can imagine, the stone phallus had gone through a fair bit of wear and tear in its time meaning it had to be reconstructed from 14 smaller fragments. Fear not though, it's back to its former glory and is fully intact.

One final thing: due to it being life size, scientists say there's a definite possibility that it could've been used as a sex aid by its makers.

We'll leave you with that wonderful thought...

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[H/T BuzzFeed]