Trans Woman Comes Out '100 Times A Year' To Mother Who Has Dementia, Her Response Is Always Loving

Trans Woman Comes Out '100 Times A Year' To Mum Who Has Dementia

Coming out to your parents as a trans woman or man is always an emotional experience - a mixture of relief but also fear that they might not accept your decision.

But for Tina Healy, who lives in Melbourne Australia and works as an advocate for Gender Diversity Australia, her mother responds with nothing but love.

Talking to ABC, she said: "My Mum has dementia and quite a few of my family were concerned about what would happen if I came out to Mum, whether she might be too stressed to handle it. And anyway, so when I eventually came out to Mum, I did it early in the morning and she listened. I kept it very simple.

"And she said - at the end of it, she said, 'Well,' she said, 'What do you know?' She said, 'I've got a beautiful new daughter.' And she said, 'Come here, love.' And I cried on her shoulder... it was all wonderful."

She added: "I go and see Mum every few weeks and she's forgotten each time, and every time I tell her again, she gives me just the same beautiful reaction that she did exactly the same, almost word for word every time. I'm kind of the luckiest one of all because I get to come out to Mum 100 times a year, and every time, she's beautiful."

Three generations of a family respond to a transgender coming out

"I'm the luckiest one of all because I get to come out to Mum a hundred times a year and every time she's beautiful."Tina came out as #transgender three and a half years ago and inspired her daughter to write a children's book at the same time.See her story: http://www.abc.net.au/7.30/content/2015/s4341049.htm

Posted by 7.30 on Tuesday, 27 October 2015

Healy was married, has four adult children and grandchildren, and came out as a trans woman in her 50s. She says that her partner Tess knew she had gender issues before they got married, but Healy thought it was an illness she could overcome.

Talking to ABC, she said: "I think in your 20s, you're idealistic and we thought, "Oh, I can beat this. This is a real illness I've got," and there was something that was wrong with me. But of course it doesn't go away. It always comes back.

"It just got to a point where I think there's a tipping point where you just can't wait anymore. You've waited a long time and it gets to that stage of your life where you need to think of yourself."

Her daughter Jessica Walton also spoke of her reaction when Healy told her about transitioning.

"I was really worried that I was going to lose my Dad. I think we all did go through that stage of grief, but because there were four of us, we were all able to be there for one another.

"Eventually you come out the other side and realise that you now know your parent better than you ever did."

(H/T: Buzzfeed)

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