19/09/2017 12:26 BST | Updated 25/09/2017 09:49 BST

Too Tired For Sex? There's No Such Thing, According To These 7 (Very) Traditional Marriage Tips

I need to cook every day and never, ever ask where my husband's been.

Franck Metois via Getty Images


I got married about two years ago -- and anyone and everyone who knew I was about to tie the knot was not shy to give me marriage advice.

Further, as per culture, older well-meaning married women from my hometown of Ulundi in KwaZulu-Natal also sat me down to give me tips about how to navigate this new chapter of my life.

And boy, I can tell you, I cringed, my heart beat a little faster and I held myself from bursting out in laughter from some of the well-meaning but sometimes questionable advice.

There were some really good ones but below is a list of my top seven weird, hilarious and downright sexist tips ones, to say the least -- from everyone who ever said anything to me during that period.

I should also mention that many of my married friends and colleagues have also heard the same:

1. 'Kuyabekezelwa emshadweni' - you persevere through everything

There may be instances of cheating and even a child outside of wedlock -- it's not the end of the world. Men are men. The experience will only make you stronger.

2. If you want a heart attack, check his phone

You never check a man's phone. If you do, it's at your own risk.

3. 'Indoda ayibuzwaibuyaphi' -- you do not ask a man where he's coming from or where he's been

Just let him be. In fact, don't ask him too many questions, period. Men hate nagging wives.

4. A man must eat, literally

No man can stand a woman who cannot cook. Further, no man wants to warm his own food in the microwave. No matter how late he comes home, you must warm his food and bring it on a tray.

5. There is no being too tired for sex when you are married

You must be ever-ready. Otherwise, he will just find it elsewhere -- and it will be all your fault.

Read: It's Not Surprising That Some Women Lose Interest In Sex A Year Into The Relationship.

6. Don't have too many female friends -- one of them will probably try to steal him from you

Men are weak and can't control themselves.

7. Love his mother (your mother-in-law) more than you do your own

You belong to this new family now and you have a new mother.