Nick Abbot

LBC 97.3 talk show host, DJ and writer.

Currently, I am heard on LBC 97.3 in London and online on Friday and Saturday at 10pm.

I have three collections of columns on Amazon, the latest of which is here :
Honky Honk Women...And

Honky Honk Women...And Men

Fifty percent of drivers in the UK admit to breaking traffic laws, which means that the other fifty percent are lying. Everybody breaks traffic laws, it is what they are there for...
01/05/2015 10:52 BST
On The Cusp of Something

On The Cusp of Something BIG

Top Gear is watched in practically every country on earth. There is no other programme that crosses divides quite like it. Mr Bean comes to mind but not much else.
04/04/2015 22:31 BST

Massed Debaters

At several points in the broadcast, all seven were shouting over each other while the chairwoman attempted to create order. It looked as easy as wrangling kittens.
03/04/2015 16:15 BST

Top Tears

It was not Danny Cohen or Tony Hall or Oisin Tymon that killed Top Gear. It was the man who made it in the first place. I am a big fan of his work but, based on the evidence we have heard over the past few weeks, I am not such a big fan of the man any more.
26/03/2015 19:04 GMT
Money for

Money for Something

If it goes on like this, pretty soon there won't be anyone left to vote for. Practically everyone who is an MP, and many who have only thought of becoming one, are currently suspended, pending an investigation into their willingness to accept money from shady sources.
25/03/2015 14:22 GMT
We Want Our

We Want Our Dinner!

What should have been a personal moment between two people, that could have been sorted out to the satisfaction of everyone concerned, in private, has been blown up to a story so huge that you could see it from the Space Station.
16/03/2015 16:07 GMT
Springtime for

Springtime for Nigel

None of the lurid and gleeful headlines generated about Ukip had anything to do with them, or at the very most described conditions that are symptomatic of all parties. This knowledge, of course, did not stay the hand of the Fleet Street executioners.
02/03/2015 11:42 GMT
You Think Dog Product On Your Shoes Is

You Think Dog Product On Your Shoes Is Bad!

Revelling in this awesome sight, rather than swimming away as fast as they could, the diving group got covered like a cake in frosting. They claim that when the whale left the area, perhaps for hygiene reasons, the waste washed off them and left no smell.
22/01/2015 15:58 GMT
Fluttering From the

Fluttering From the Guttering

We know that our politicians lie and obfuscate for their personal benefit. It is a shame that we and the media, those people that are supposed to transmit the unvarnished truth, are in any way different.
24/11/2014 15:02 GMT
He's Not the Messiah, He's Just Styled That

He's Not the Messiah, He's Just Styled That Way

I can't believe I am about to say this, but Donald Trump is right. The Donald has been in a Twitter spat with Russell Brand. A Twitter spat is something that no self respecting person over school age should be engaging in, so you have a measure of the combatants from the start.
20/10/2014 11:30 BST
Clackers Goes Crackers for

Clackers Goes Crackers for Kippers

Minds were boggled and stupefaction abounded. It was as though no one was expecting it. Ukip's win in that desperate, grey, spume flecked boil on the backside of Essex was greeted as the first sight of a solar eclipse must have been received by a cave man. We were not expecting THAT... But we were. Everyone knew it would happen months ago.
13/10/2014 15:44 BST
The Parties'

The Parties' Parties

Conference season comes hard on the breathtakingly long holiday that our diligent representatives enjoy in the summer. It is so long, it straddles both Spring and Autumn and would probably subsume Winter, if they did not also get a stonking great break over Christmas.
02/10/2014 10:24 BST
Don't Panic

Don't Panic (Much)

The Home Secretary, Theresa Kitten Heels May, has announced that The Threat Level had been raised from "Casual insouciance" to "Run to the hills". On the five point gradation of fear, we are now at the second most terrifying, leaving only "Abandon all hope" to go.
30/08/2014 14:45 BST
The Commonwealth Games - The Joy of

The Commonwealth Games - The Joy of Whingeing

The one event that was not shifted about like a wrestler's jock strap was the closing ceremony of the Commonwealth Games, featuring a collection of countries that Britain holds so little sway over that it seemed like a meeting of human rights refuseniks.
05/08/2014 11:12 BST
Man's Greatest Achievement - Not Getting

Man's Greatest Achievement - Not Getting Sticky

Summer this year has so far been a blink and you'll miss it affair, but it lasted long enough to cause an explosion of Coca-Cola in Somerset. Not an explosion of sales, an explosion of the actual drink itself.
08/07/2014 10:54 BST
The Tube of

The Tube of Death

This can not be right. I can watch three hours of TV while eating breakfast. This must be research undertaken by some comedy institution that no-one has ever heard of. Well, I can tell you right now that the students at the University of Navarra in Pamplona, would beg to differ.
30/06/2014 16:14 BST
And They're Off to a Standing

And They're Off to a Standing Start

Who will win the World Cup? McDonald's, Coca Cola and Budweiser. And the Chinese, who are the ones making all those shortly to be discarded fluttering plastic national flags...
16/06/2014 15:27 BST