My first thought - how did Vodafone manage to afford it? I think we all know they've not been doing too well over the last few years, don't we? Otherwise they wouldn't have had to put all that time and effort into highly complicated international tax-avoidance schemes to dodge the billions of pounds they owe this country.
It was hard not to feel at least a little pulse of dread across your guts whenever you saw The Tunnel coming up in the diary. The audience was volatile and unpredictable. Often they'd be good as gold, but if they decided to heckle, you could expect anything from brilliant and witty to mob aggression or flying objects.
18/11/2013 17:40 GMT
So let me get this straight; Owen Patterson, the Environment Secretary, admits he has been outwitted in the War on Badgers...by the badgers.
30/10/2013 14:20 GMT
When Russia arrested the crew of the Greenpeace vessel <em>Arctic Sunrise</em> in September for trying to mount a demonstration on an oil rig in the Barents Sea, it's fair to say that most of the earth's population felt relief that finally one of the world's largest military powers had found the courage to stand up to the bullying tactics of thirty environmental protestors armed with banners...
17/10/2013 12:55 BST
At the time of writing it looks like a casual remark by Secretary of State John Kerry has accidentally made the third world war a little less likely.
11/09/2013 22:30 BST
And here of course, we have a royal baby. Really cheers you up. Apparently the queues at the food-banks have never been happier. And it's great to see that at least there's one family dependent on state benefits who aren't being penalised by the Bedroom Tax.
08/08/2013 16:20 BST
On Monday 4 March a man called Sergei Magnitsky will go on trial in Moscow for fraud and tax evasion. If he's found guilty, it's not clear where Mr Magnitsky will serve his sentence, because he's been dead since 2009.
06/03/2013 15:43 GMT
I can exclusively reveal that the Pope has resigned because the body of Christ has been found in a ready meal.
14/02/2013 14:28 GMT
Imagine a world where everyone had enough, a world with no famine ot poverty and where every child had access to free education. Admittedly, there is a superficial attraction, but think again: a fair world would be a world with no need for charity and glamorous fundraising events.
05/02/2013 16:04 GMT
In 1972 it was either Henry Kissinger or Richard Nixon who asked the Chinese Foreign Minster Chou en Lai what he thought were the main effects of the French Revolution in 1789. And Chou en Lai said, "It's still too early to tell."
28/08/2012 12:31 BST
Surely, the safest option is to trust no-one, right from the moment you enter the lobby. Or indeed, before. So, a few simple rules to maximise the satisfaction of your American cinema-going experience.
27/07/2012 12:01 BST
Another reason Russia gets bad press is because since 2000, 17 journalists have been murdered in crimes linked to their work, with only one (partially) successful prosecution. It's clearly and indisputably sheer coincidence that all those journalists were murdered while investigating corruption, financial criminality, human rights abuses in the army, government and legal system.
16/07/2012 22:59 BST
Don't know whether you saw this - but God appeared and spoke to someone the other day. I'm surprised it didn't get wider coverage, but that's aggressive secularism in the modern world for you.
05/07/2012 18:25 BST
The island of Jersey is threatening to break its link with Britain in retaliation against the draconian proposal from Downing Street that Jersey might want to narrow the gap in its banking and tax regulations between what is technically legal and what is conventionally considered immoral and unfair.
28/06/2012 15:21 BST
The liberty voucher scheme would guarantee absolute freedom of movement within a far less threatening environment, because people tempted to pilfer, commit street crime or burglary out of diminshed means would not be out and about.
25/06/2012 14:32 BST
I am so excited my brain can literally not think in a straight line why because we're all buzzed up counting down the days left to the Queen's Diamond Geezer weekend which is now literally only a few days away and I literally cannot wait...
31/05/2012 11:13 BST
The Opposition Front Bench are calling you "complacent and out of touch". (You may not have heard about this, for whatever reason.) Well, it's not just them; it's a growing mood. In fact there's a rumour that "complacent and out of touch" is the motto on your coat-of-arms.
25/05/2012 15:06 BST