Yes, you heard us correctly, bring out the cheeseboard and stock up on Baileys, because the festive season has officially begun.
Normally this is just an insanity that journalists have to endure after being bombarded with emails from PRs, but now it’s gone mainstream: Selfridges have opened their Christmas shop - an entire floor in the Oxford Street store complete with 50,000 decorations.
In celebration of this joyous, festive wonderland, we’ve decided that all Christmas celebrations should start just after the summer solstice...
Bear with us, Christmas haters...
1. The weather is so miserable, it might as well be December.
2. We’re as broke in summer as in winter, so a consistent stream of presents that we can flog on Ebay would be ideal.
3. Novelty knitwear is a great round-the-clock defense against office air conditioning.
4. If we behave as badly as we do at the Christmas party six months ahead, our boss is in for less of a shock.
6. Having mistletoe in every social situation would be a great ice breaker.
7. Pigs in blankets would taste so good on the BBQ.
8. Christmas is an amnesty to turning up hungover at work, why wouldn’t you want that all year long?