Cast your mind back roughly 300 years to January, and you may recall a truly iconic daytime TV moment when 81-year-old Iris Jones stopped by This Morning to discuss her romance with her 36-year-old partner, Mohammed.
As presenters Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield interviewed Iris about her relationship, things took a rather graphic turn as Iris began sharing intimate details about the romance.
And yes, that included the “whole tube of KY jelly” she went through on their first night together.
Well, it’s been eight months, and Iris has finally done the world a favour and given a second interview to the ITV show, this time with Mohammed by her side.
And things were every bit as chaotic the second time around, we can assure you.
Speaking live from Cairo, Iris first updated the hosts on where things were at with their impending marriage, after which Mohammed got a few things off his own chest, in particular the way their relationship had been spoken about online.
“I found [when we met] that Iris understood me… love doesn’t know any difference between religion, between age, between countries,” he said. “This is our life. Iris chose me and I chose Iris. That’s all that matters.
“And I want to say something… for all the people [that] attack our love… it’s not your business, focus your lives. Go to hell, that’s all!”
“He’s very passionate about his feelings,” Iris interjected.
Mohammed continued: “I am angry, please listen to me, I am angry about saying on [the] media. You are saying and other people are saying ‘toyboy’. I am not a ‘toyboy’. I am a man. I am a man, OK? I am not a game, please don’t say that again.”
Iris then said: “Because ‘toyboy’ means a game. Our life is not a game. Normally Mohammed is very, very shy when he’s speaking. He’s not shy in bed.”
On that note, Holly questioned whether Mohammed had “had a bit of a word” with Iris after her first appearance on This Morning, to which she responded: “He asked ‘why was I so graphic?’. I said, ‘because I speak the truth’. I mean, I brought KY jelly with me this time [in Cairo], but we didn’t open it. We haven’t used it, I might take it back to the shop and get my money back.”
“Iris, I told you not to say that,” Mohammed then laughed, before apologising to the hosts.
At the end of the interview, Iris addressed the nation, asking if there were any job opportunities for Mohammed – or herself – in TV.
She explained: “I would like to say, Mohammed is open to offers. You’ve only got to look at that face and that hair… and he’s got a perfect six pack if he keeps his stomach in. He’s available for television work.
“And if anyone wants an 81-year-old woman for a fashion shoot, I’m your woman. I’m here, waiting. We could do with the money, because we’ve been spending like there’s no tomorrow! And we’re both broke.”
While we’ve got you, shall we all just revisit Iris’ original This Morning appearance in all its couldn’t-walk-the-next-day, felt-like-I’d-been-riding-a-horse, saddle-sore-wasn’t-in-it glory?
Truly majestic.
This Morning airs every weekday from 10am on ITV.