08/11/2018 10:00 GMT | Updated 08/11/2018 10:59 GMT

'My Poor Vagina': Women Are Describing Childbirth In Three Words And It's Revealing

"Ouch, ouch, yay!" or "Never, ever again" – what would yours be?

How would you describe your birth in three words? Absolutely bloody terrifying? The most wonderful experience? Can’t remember it?

Women have been trying to find three simple words that perfectly capture the moment their child was born – and the results are a mix of painful, soppy and hilarious.

Mush, an app for new mums in the UK, asked its audience what words they’d use and shared their findings with HuffPost UK. We’ve picked some of the best.

[Read More: I sat down to watch ‘Die Hard 2’ – 50 minutes later I had my baby]

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Piece of piss

Facing wrong way

Pain, fear, love

What a shambles

My poor vagina

Never, ever again

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Fast, hot, rip

Total cluster fuck

Absolutely fucking brilliant

Ouch, ouch, yay

Best experience ever

It bloody hurt

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Blink, missed it

Push that poo

Words can’t describe

No more children

Worse than nightmare

Have experienced worse

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Just in time

Needed new vag

Quick 12 minutes

Away with fairies

Oh holy shit.

How would you describe yours? Comment below or email in your experiences to And if you’d like to share your birth story in our weekly Birth Diaries series, drop us an email!