“Will having sex hurt my baby?” and “Will I poo during labour? are just two of the questions that mums-to-be are too embarrassed to ask when having check-up appointments during pregnancy.
Research from Mothercare, who surveyed more than 2,000 parents, found that just under a third (29 per cent) worried they would look like bad parents if they asked all the questions in their head - with 34 per cent turning to conflicting information online.
Fear of embarrassment is one of the main reasons expectant parents withheld questions they would otherwise ask, leaving nearly four fifths (79 per cent) of them not feeling confident in their knowledge of pregnancy and childbirth.
Worryingly because of this, almost 80% of expectant parents do not feel sufficiently informed about pregnancy or the first few months with their newborn.
“Pregnancy can be such an overwhelming and anxious time. Everyone has their own thoughts and opinions, there’s a counter argument for everything on the internet and you might not see the same midwife twice, which is why it is so important to ask any questions you may have,” said Carly Rowena, soon-to-be first-time mum and Mothercare supporter. “From the tiny worries to those embarrassing ones, no question is too small or silly to ask.”
Top 10 most popular questions that parents and expectant parents wanted to know during pregnancy:
Does having sex hurt my baby? [26% of respondents said they were embarrassed to ask this]
The NHS states: “Having sex will not hurt your baby. Your partner’s penis can’t penetrate beyond your vagina, and the baby cannot tell what’s going on.”
Will a woman poo when giving birth? [25%]
Mothercare’s parenting consultant, Elizabeth Day, said a woman does not always poo during pregnancy, however most woman do. “This is because the same muscles used when having a bowel movement are the same ones engaged when pushing in labour and there is extra pressure on the colon and rectum with a baby moving through the birth canal,” she said.
Can my baby hear outside conversations? [19%]
Your baby will start to hear between 23 and 27 weeks. If he/she can hear what’s going on, he/she may respond by moving around more. Studies of newborn behaviour have shown that babies get used to the music and voices they’ve heard in the womb.
What will happen to my sex drive after I give birth? [17%]
Day said this is different for everyone and it is hard to categorically say either way. “Some couples find their sex lives as parents are better than ever before, but most make love less than they used to,” she said. “Most couples wait for a few months, and the first time, post-birth, can be scary for both of you.”
Will my partner not be attracted to me after giving birth? [14%]
Like everything with pregnancy, everyone is different and will react differently to the stresses of becoming a first-time parent. “Some experts recommend a couple spend quality time with each other one night a week away from the children, one weekend a month, or one week a year,” said Day.
Does my baby have food preferences? [10%]
Your baby’s taste preferences start at birth. Just like most adults, babies tend to be more accepting of something that is familiar to them. Day said when they start solid foods, the most familiar food to them is going to be breastmilk or formula, so that taste and texture is what they will compare everything else to.
What happens if I drop my baby? [9%]
Day said this is a common question that comes up in all parent-to-be social groups. “Just remember you will get used to holding your baby and be doing it so much you will soon become a pro,” she said. “Watch how the experts do it midwives and nurses in the unit – they do hold babies quite firmly and support baby’s head.”
She said if you worried at the start take your time and make sure you check out risks such as tripping over things on the stairs and on the floor.
Can a woman wear tampons after giving birth? [9%]
Women are advised not to use tampons until they’ve had their six-week postnatal check due to the higher risk of infection.
Will curry give my baby heartburn? [8%]
“Your diet is unlikely to really distress the baby but if you’re concerned, ask your midwife or health care visitor,” said Day.
If my baby gets hiccups, will I? [6%]
No, hiccups are common in newborns and babies under one due to their still-developing digestive system.
For more information on what is happening during your pregnancy week-by-week, read the NHS guide here.