The Emotional Stages Of Watching A Sex Scene With Your Parents

As an adult child, nothing is more mortifying than watching a sex scene with your parents.

It doesn’t matter how old you are or whether you’ve got kids, the entire experience makes you desperately wish for the sofa to swallow you whole.

Here, we depict the emotional stages of watching such a terrible, terrible thing.

1. Happiness

You’re sat watching a film with your parents on a Sunday evening after a scrumptious roast. You’re content, full up and nothing could dampen your spirits...

2. Concern

You realise the film you’re watching is quite the romance-filled number and your parents don’t seem to be switching it over.

3. Dread

In fact, a woman is unbuttoning her shirt on your parents’ high definition 50” TV. Some guy is kissing her neck. Oh shit, you know what happens next.

4. Shock

There’s nudity, there are groans, it’s really awkward. PEOPLE ARE ABOUT TO HAVE SEX AND YOU HAVE NOWHERE TO RUN.

5. Horror

Penetration has occurred, there’s a lot of thrusting occurring on the TV screen and you don’t know where to look.

6. Embarrassment

You’re currently considering talking over the TV so your parents look at you instead of the screen. There’s still time...

7. Curiosity

You spare a moment to ponder whether they feel as awkward about this as you do.

8. Regret

You then wonder why you didn’t turn this damn channel over when you had the chance.

9. Relief

It ends as fast as it began. Now somebody call me a cab home.