Kardashian Fashmashian

13/03/2012 12:00 GMT | Updated 12/05/2012 10:12 BST

Did you ever wake up one morning and think you looked like Kim Kardashian? No? Me neither. So why did I go out and buy this silky steel-grey Jumpsuit that looks exactly like something La Kim would wear? (so, so well) Another fashion feck-up. Oh well, said a friend, at least you've got something to wear on your next sky diving expedition...


I bought it after a lunch with my Positive Enthusiastic Friend (never go shopping with a PE Friend, like Sixth Sense Boy, they see things that aren't there). I put on the Jumpsuit and PE friend said: "It's perfect! It will be great for that evening soiree in the City. All it needs is...a slim dark brown wraparound belt, long slinky seventies earings and high gold sandals." I don't have any of those. It was two sizes bigger than what I normally wear. But it was on sale, reduced to a third of the price.

Later, at home, another friend surveyed the damage: You need big boobs and bootilicous bum (ie. you need to be Kim) to wear that Jumpsuit.'s way too big for you, it needs to be taken in.

Hmmm. So now this purchase has contravened no less than four of my shopping rules.

Jody's Shopping Rules:

1. Never buy something on sale that you wouldn't pay full price for. (Or you can't take back.)

2. The colour, fit and size must all be right. All three of those things. Ah-ah-ah, ALL three.

3. Wearing the piece must not be contingent on buying suitable shoes, belt, earings etc. to go with. You will never find those shoes, belt, earings and the search will drive you crazy.

4. Never buy something for a life you don't have. There are no "soirees in the City" in my future.

I have not shown you the back view of this jumpsuit, but without Kim's bum it has the poopy droopy effect.

Any fashion feck-ups in your wardrobe? Go on, make my day!