14/08/2017 05:45 BST | Updated 14/08/2017 05:45 BST

14 Honest #StartupLife Confessions From A Female Founder

Being a start-up founder isn't a job, it's an all-consuming, crazy rollercoaster of a journey that you have to have a screw loose (or two) to ride. Here's 14 things that have happened to everyone living the #startuplife, and an insight into what it's like to be broke, ambitious and a little bit crazy... (disclaimer: These confessions are to be taken as some tongue-in-cheek, light-hearted relief)

  1. You go to events just for free food/drink. Actually, you feel totally cheated if there's no food at an event. This means that pizza, wine and questionable canapés are now a staple of your diet.
  2. You spend more than you generate in monthly revenue on coffee
  3. You get stupidly over-excited at every single sale, especially when it's from someone you don't actually know.
  4. You think you've finally "got it" multiple times a week...for months on end.
  5. You've brutally analysed every single person you know for the likelihood they'll invest in you. And consider entering day time TV competitions or, failing that, you consider you could maybe get away with a bank robbery. Sure, you might end up in prison, but at least you haven't had to go to any more networking events...
  6. You'd rather stick pins in your eyes than be asked one more time..."so what do you do..?"
  7. Your new office has a ping-pong table and a beer tap...and your entire team has branded stickers on their Macs.
  8. You collect 10000001 business cards from shows, events and exhibitions, but don't have any yourself.
  9. You speak to your co-founders more than you speak to your friends, parents and boyfriend combined
  10. You notice people's eyes glazing over as you talk about seed rounds, SEIS, business valuations and the ins and outs of crowdfunding...
  11. Your mood changes from, "This is the best idea in the world" to "this was a s*** idea, I'm going to fail" approximately every hour.
  12. You consider buying branded hats, bags and other swag a better investment than actually paying yourself.
  13. You're not entirely sure what a weekend is any more
  14. You consider maybe going back to the 9-5 so you can try this "weekend" thing...and then remember that you're a badass crazy little legend who was born to be so much more than a 9-5 and actually your idea is pretty awesome so you'll stick with it because the world needs you. You go Glen Coco.