Take a walk in my heels and converse

Take a walk in my heels and converse
Peter Dazeley via Getty Images

What is an aesthetically attractive female? A revealing outfit? A pretty face? A good figure? All of the above? Anyway aren't people's looks subjective to what constitutes attractive? It could be any number of things, right?

So why am I asking these questions? It is because I find this slightly controversial subject so frustrating especially as I have read and heard from one or two female comedians that "attractive female comics have it easy."

You may want to place me in that "attractive" category. I work out, I have modeled and I have large boobs for my frame, so this makes me have an easy life? Far from it.

My first ever heckle was from a woman. I had been on the circuit for four months when a drunk woman from the back row shouted "They're only laughing cuz they wanna f*** you." Charming. Luckily I fired back: "Well at least someone here will be getting f***ed". But, I went home and let this woman, who was so unimportant in my life, make me feel absolutely terrible about myself and question my talent as a performer.

So I went on to change my image. A social experiment. Jeans, T shirt and Converse trainers. Soon after my make under, after a gig in Birmingham, I was felt up by a promoter, telling me he loved looking at my body. Karma will get him.

And then there are the times when I tell people I do stand-up comedy and I (quite regularly) get "but you don't look like a comedian ." WHAT DOES A COMEDIAN LOOK LIKE?

From the day I joined the London comedy scene, I have witnessed and experienced some promoters, a few fellow comics and audience members treat the "attractive " comics as bimbos, pieces of meat and quite literally a joke. I'm not here to complain about that, it is simply the way of the world and this has been ingrained into society since before my grandma was born.

So when someone who places themselves in the "unattractive" category by their own accord and preaches on social media how hard it is for them and how easy it is for others, I can't help but think maybe they might want to focus on themselves instead of whining about others.

There was an outcry when the posters on the underground came out of a toned woman modelling with the quote "Are you beach body ready?" Women were photographed next to the image showing off their size 16 figures making the point that their body was also ready - then vandalizing the poster. Social media went wild from female comics stating the model was unrealistic and it offended them. But saying the ad is body shaming by body shaming the image is very contradictory. What did they expect to see to model a bikini? A pineapple? A models job is to stay fit and healthy. Surely using an overweight person (or a pineapple) to advertise a bikini and a protein drink would seem bizarre?

Undoubtedly, confidence is what makes someone beautiful no matter what shape or size you are. I'm not prepared to gain weight or cover up, I chose to enjoy my looks while they last. But being ridiculed for being attractive is hard. Especially when it comes from a woman.

If this blog has offended anyone, it certainly wasn't my attention. I just feel it's only fair everyone has voice, and I haven't had mine yet in the fear of looking harsh.

This blog will self-destruct in five minutes.

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