critics

I myself am a below average/piss poor comedian. I probably would have benefited from hearing the hard truth from the community/a 'Roaming Critic' a long time ago. Imagine the money I could have saved on train fares to the capital.
I was clearly never cut out to be a critic, but I'm fascinated by the process even to this day. In particular, I'm interested in what makes their opinions 'different' from those public ones to which the internet has given a voice.
Teachers may choose to inspire, mentor, guide or coach their students in their own unique way. This is how a teacher becomes an artist.
Don't get me wrong, it was a joy the first time I saw my name in print and I still get a buzz when someone uses one of my quotes but really you can take self-importance too far...
The best thing about the Oscars is, in my opinion, the aftermath of the Oscars. I say this, because I don't have a lot of time for the actual ceremony unless it's in small chunks online. That's where it makes sense.
I have a Sh*t List. It runs to several pages and includes back stabbers, fence sitters, fair-weather friends and a smattering of generalised ars*holes.
I was curious to know what it's like to be a critic at the Fringe. If you watch 10 shows a day how do you stay open minded? Is Twitter and the multi-headed reviewer blog hydra killing the role of the critic, now that everyone's a critic? Why work as a critic in the first place?
Critics have a bit of a reputation for watching your work with what locals up here would call 'a face like a smacked arse' but when I forced her to sit in my eyeline and wear a party hat like everyone else she looked engaged and even LOL'ed - why was I staring at her during the show as if I could predict her review or manipulate her experience?
I have been a critic for much longer than I have been a poet. Being a writer is tough. In a world where everyone who owns a Macbook and lives near a coffee house is a novelist, getting your work recognised is difficult, having it appraised even harder.
Tech Sergeant Epps and Captain Lennox quickly worked out in 2007′s Transformers that their conventional ammunition wasn't