The ten things you need to know on Monday 22 April... 1) 'CRUNCH WEEK' FOR OSBORNE The Telegraph says this is the "crunch
I met a literary agent the other day. She told me that these days when you sell a novel to publishers, there has to be a USP. "A what?" I said. "'Unique Selling Point. You know, narrated by a hermaphrodite, or someone who has been repeatedly raped by their grandfather, that sort of thing.
Then he'll become angry and question that if Brighton & Hove is so fantastic, why there aren't any member clubs like there are in London? He'll order a second Kir Royale after realising his mates are going to be late (they always are in London) and thinks that maybe he should set one up.
Another festival, another corporate cluster bomb. Or not, as I discovered at the Secret Garden Party.