pursuit of happiness
What isn't remembered or talked about is how much money we made, how big our house was, what car we drove, how successful we were in our career, or anything else acquired through money, status and power, and yet many of us spend a disproportionate amount of our time and effort trying to "succeed" at these things.
Happiness is something we all strive for, but do you know the benefits it can bring; how happiness is a skill that can be
It's okay to admit you need a break. And most importantly it's okay not to be okay, and the sooner we admit this and talk about it with the people around us, the sooner we can get rid of the stigma attached to be anything but happy.
Consequently, happiness is somewhat slippery and elusive. We experience happiness sometimes, we know what it feels like, and we know how good it is. When we don't have it, we may want it. Happiness has more adaptive value when it is always just out of reach, driving us to seek it out, yet always seeming to pull away from us.
I do usually manage to fit in some writing during the day but it is sometimes hard to find the motivation as well as the time. So by last weekend, after a whole week of not writing, it was tempting to think that perhaps I should find a job and contribute to the family in a more measurable way - i.e. financially.
Basically as you get older, you realise that you are not the only person in the world who worries about things. Everyone is riddled with insecurities, they just manifest them in different ways, or if they are really lucky, they have learned to overcome their difficulties (I recently re-read M Scott Peck's The Road Less Travelled and it was brilliant on this subject).
What, actually, is it? What is 'happiness'? What are we talking about? Somewhat bizarrely people are very happy to give, or sell, their advice on how to be happy without ever trying to say what it is. But how can we find something if we don't know what we're looking for?
I used to think success led to happiness. You might think that too if you believe this myth. But in fact this is a total myth. Sure, reaching goals and milestones give you a moment of joy, delight and a sense of achievement (rightfully so!).
Happiness is an inside job. No one can make us happy. There is no point in waiting for someone to come along and take that responsibility for us - it's ours. And on top of that - if we assign the responsibility of our happiness to someone else what a huge burden we are putting on their backs.
Healthy boundaries ensure that our lives are in balance, with no one area dominating another, so we feel content, and most importantly, in control.