How many times have you looked at your phone today?
A lot, right?
How many of those times did you check social media?
I'm sure you probably can't remember but I'm willing to bet it was the vast majority.
Don't worry though, you're not alone...not by a long stretch.
A study carried out by web analytics company SDL found people between the ages of 18 and 36 check their phone 43 times a day on average, worldwide. [1]
Another study conducted by the Nottingham Trent University found that "people use their smartphones for an average of five hours a day - about a third of the time they are awake - and check them about 85 times a day." [2]
We live in a hyper-connected world where everyone is always 'on'.
Never have we been easier to reach so instantly and as a result never have we been under more pressure from advertising.
We're hounded daily by people telling us we need to look a certain way or adhere to a particular body ideal.
From clothing adverts, to social media accounts and more. We begin to believe this look is the norm, something we must strive for and that without this we are nothing.
We're told that to be a 'proper man' we need to build more muscle, lose more fat, get stronger and be sexier.
So what do we do?
We buy into it.
We start believing that we need to look this way, even believing it's the only way to be sexy, successful and accepted.
We believe that this will validate us.
We seek out role models, motivators and leaders who we aspire to be.
We strive to create the 'look' of someone else's body all the while slowly disliking ourselves more and more in favour of looking like someone else.
Before you know it body confidence is at all-time low.
We start talking to ourselves negatively, putting ourselves down and turning away from our bodies.
We underappreciate what we see in the mirror, undervalue our self-worth and mentally confine ourselves to a life of body dissatisfaction and low confidence.
All the while holding onto the thought that once we reach this 'look' everything will be better again.
If only we can get there, we'll suddenly be happy and fulfilled.
But at what cost?
In our desperation to want what others have we neglect our bodies, we treat them as temporary, a way to look until we reach our body goals.
We essentially stop wanting to be ourselves and start wanting to be someone else.
Now, I'm not saying we don't need sources of motivation, inspiration and guidance.
We do.
In fact, having people who we can turn to for help is vital to the longevity of our success.
However, the root of our body confidence must come from within.
The fix.
Body confidence is not a pipedream. It's 100% achievable if you know how.
The first step on this road is to learn how to accept who you are. A big step towards this goal is to become your own role model and stop comparing yourself to other people.
- To realise this is your journey, unique and personal to you and you can make any change you want.
- To know you have the control to look however you desire and feel good doing so.
- To inspire your own success, to stop wishing you looked like someone else and learn how to be the best version of yourself.
- To know that you are fully capable of re-building your body confidence and taking control of your life and body once again.
The point is this...
...everyone is different and try as you might you cannot recreate someone else's look.
Sure you could achieve the same level of body fat and approximately the same amount of muscle mass but at the end of the day you won't look the same.
You will never look like someone else, you will only ever look like yourself.
You have to be happy with this.
You need to make a mental shift and strive to create your own physique not someone else's.
To learn more and get my free 3 simple strategies worksheet to help you start accepting yourself today click here.
Thanks for reading.
References:
[1] https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/234531
[2] http://www4.ntu.ac.uk/apps/news/180892-15/People_check_their_smartphones_85_times_a_day_(and_they_dont_even_know_the.aspx