Celebrity baby names are a constant source of amusement, but that doesn't seem to stop them cropping up in playgroups near you. No sooner does an A-lister pick a fruit-based moniker than so do hordes of OK! readers.
In typical controversial style, for this is the Totally Honest Guide To Baby Names, I thought it might be fun to spot the differing trends in baby names between the celebrity A-list, B-list and Z-list, and to speculate wildly on what impact those names will have in the nation's playgrounds. Disagree? Go on, add a comment...
The trend: Spiritual, worldly, wise-sounding names that elevate the baby beyond the parents' profession, which, with the exception of Barack Obama on this list, could be considered to be mucking around in face paint.
Impact in the playground: The kids hanging around at the edges hoping not to get spotted. Until they're older that is, when they'll suddenly get cool.
- Nicole Kidman & Keith Urban - Sunday Rose
- Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes - Suri
- Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt - Shiloh Nouvel, Knox Leon, Vivienne Marcheline
- Madonna - Lourdes, Rocco
- Kate Moss & Jefferson Hack - Lila Grace
- Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin - Apple, Moses
- Barack & Michelle Obama - Malia, Sasha
- Elle MacPherson & Arpad Busson - Aurelius Cy
The trend: Flowery, totally made up, or in homage to their mums and childhood pin-ups. Sweeeeeet.
Impact in the playground: Put it this way, they don't sound like the kind of names that will crop up as prime ministers or brain surgeons in the future. In fact, it could well be a generation of florists.
- Katie Price & Peter Andre - Princess Tiaamii, Junior
- Geri Halliwell - Bluebell Madonna
- Jamie & Jules Oliver - Poppy Honey, Daisy Boo
- Davina McCall & Mathew Robertson - Chester, Holly, Tilly
- Tess Daly & Vernon Kaye - Phoebe
- Melanie Brown & Eddie Murphy - Angel
And then there's the Z-List
The trend: Does my baby sound a bit famous already?
Impact in the playground: First in the queue for the role of sheep in the school Nativity play (ouch, is that too harsh?).
- Kerry Katona & Mark Croft - Maxwell (yes, after Kerry's publicist Max Clifford), Heidi
- Tina O'Brien & Ryan Thomas (Coronation Street) - Scarlett Jacqueline
- Tamara Beckwith & Georgio Veroni - Violet
- Maria Lawson (X-Factor) - Brandon