Of all the appalling confessions I have made on these pages, what follows is perhaps the most damaging. I have never used Facebook. Never in my life have I logged on or Faced up or reached out across the electronic superhighway to poke any of my Facebook friends, even if I had any. In fact, I can barely tell you what the point of Facebook is meant to be. All I can see is a foaming Pactolus of gold, splashing untold riches on anyone who goes near the thing.