PARENTS

Dad Writes Open Online Letter To Son After He Finds Porn On His Computer. Would You Do The Same?

27/09/2012 19:36 | Updated 22 May 2015
Dad writes open online letter to son after he finds porn on his computer. Would you do the same?Rex

It's an excruciating moment many parents have experienced and if they haven't, most certainly dread.

Your 'curious' teenage son has pressed a few buttons, entered a few search terms – and found a top shelf's worth of porn online or worse.

Let's face it, many of us would simply rather not know. But if you were to discover your lad's exploration of the murkier side of cyberspace, what would you do about it?

Hide your head under the duvet, stick your fingers in your ears and hope it all goes away? Or do what one dad did – and write a very public open letter to the 'offending' child, explaining the rights and wrongs, your empathy and support?

One dad chose the latter option. For him, penning his 13-year-old son a letter about how proud he was of him - as well as giving him a few tips for virus-free porn sites - and then posting it on the internet seemed the best solution.

The unidentified father uploaded a letter to Reddit he claimed he had written to his son and asked web users if he had approached the situation in the best way - to mixed reviews.

He explained that he had been inspecting his teenage son's computer to find the source of a virus when he unearthed 'tons of porn' - and decided to write the boy a letter to warn him of its dangers.

He wrote:

i
I've been on this earth three times as long as you and there's nothing you have done or will do that I haven't done before. You have nothing to be embarrassed about.

i

The dad, who has since removed all user details from the page, assured the youngster that he would not tell his mother, and said it was his choice if he wanted to talk about it.

He emphasised he would not be happy if his son used sites that could cost him his computer as 'I can't afford to buy you another 1800 dollar machine because you went to a site that fried it'.

So what would you, as a mum or dad, do if something similar has happened to you?

Before you decide, have a read of this edited version of the anonymous dad's letter to see if you think he approached the subject in the right way.

"Listen, I won't tell your mom and I'm not gonna make a big deal out of this. In fact I'm not gonna make any size deal out of it. If you don't wanna talk about it that's fine and I completely understand.

"I've been on this earth three times as long as you and there's nothing you have done or will do that I haven't done before. If you want to completely ignore this ever happened then I can and will do that too.

"Please don't act awkward around me because of this. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. I just can't have an 1800 dollar machine turned into a brick because you haven't learned where to go on the internet.

i
I'm not going to put a child lock on your computer or punish you in any way because as I said you did nothing wrong. I would like you to not be back here so much though. You literally spend all of your time back here.

i

"I'd like to see you more often. I like doing stuff with you and miss it. I love you and I couldn't be more proud of you. Should I just approach him with it or is this the right thing to do.

"UPDATE: After he went in his room he came right out and talked to me. Although it didn't last for more than five minutes I think it was productive. He thanked me for not getting mad or telling mom. I also talked to him about porn not being like real life and that women aren't objects like they are portrayed in porn. I gave him the option to ask questions but he said he didn't have any right now. I hope he does later. It went really well.

"UPDATE: Seems some people haven't seen the comments. I shortened this up substantially prior to him seeing it and took some of the preachiness away. I also took away the part about it bricking his computer which I knew wasn't true but I was trying to scare him into not going to dodgy sites again. UPDATE: Holy s***. My first front page post is about my son's porn......sigh" More on Parentdish:

Check out this sensible video here:

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