Kate Middleton Hospital Prank Call: Full Transcript Of Hoax By 2DayFM DJs

Hospital Hoax Call: What Was Said

After telling listeners of Sydney's 2Day FM that the Duchess of Cambridge was pregnant and in hospital, Australian radio DJs Mel Greig and Michael Christian impersonated the Queen and the Prince of Wales to dupe hospital staff into giving a condition update over the telephone.

Here is a transcript of the recording:

Michael Christian: Now Mel, today is a very special day, it's the day a lot of people have been waiting for for a very, very long time.

Mel Greig: There has been speculation for months that Kate Middleton, married to Prince William, is pregnant. And it has been confirmed that she is pregnant, she is in hospital with severe morning sickness, poor little dear.

Christian: The thing is, though, that this condition that she has is often attached to women that are having twins, so maybe not one but two royal babies.

Greig: I would rather pump out a couple at a time. Makes it easier I think.

Christian: You make it sound so special and emotional. (does an impression of Greig) I'd rather pump out a couple, that'd be all right wouldn't it? (Laughter) Have someone in the corner of the room with a baseball mit, catching them. Pump it out.

(Laughter)

Christian: Here's the thing. We've been handed a phone number and we have been told that this phone number is the hospital where Kate Middleton is currently staying. We thought we'd give it a call. We don't want to cause any trouble, we don't want to stress her out because she is doing it tough. But I reckon we could maybe get her on the radio tonight.

Mel Greig: Look, I don't know. I mean everybody will be trying this.

Christian: Well, this is why I've thought of a plan. We can't just ring up and go 'Hi it's MC and Mel from the Summer30, can we chat to Kate?' Hang up. Not gonna happen. You are going to be the Queen...

Greig: This is awesome.

Christian: I'm going to be Prince Charles.

Greig (Queen voice): Hello, I'm the Queen.

Christian: Ben and Em (off microphone) so you're involved in this as well, we thought that maybe you could be the royal corgis, if you're OK with that?

[Barking noises]

Em: over intercom: Sure we'll pop on in, in a sec.

Christian: I'm going to dial this number.

Greig: This is fun, I mean (adopts Queen voice), this is fun.

Christian: So you're going to be the Queen.

Greig: Hello, I'm the Queen.

Christian (in a Prince Charles voice): Hello. Prince Charles over here, mummy.

Greig: Oh, you're Prince Charles, I like your ears.

Christian: Let's give this hospital a call and see if we can get Kate Middleton or maybe even Prince Wills on the phone tonight. So the number is going in ... oh Jeez, I hope this happens.

(PHONE RINGS)

Receptionist: Hello, good morning, King Edward VII Hospital.

Greig (Queen voice): Oh hello there, could I please speak to Kate please, my granddaughter.

Receptionist: Oh yes, just hold on ma'am.

Greig: Thank you.

Christian: Are they putting us through?

Greig: Yes.

(Laughter)

Christian: If this has worked, it's the easiest prank call we have ever made. Your accent sucked, by the way, I just want you to know.

(Laughter)

Greig: I'm not used to playing 80-year-olds. (Phone connects) Kate, my darling, are you there?

Nurse: Good morning, ma'am, this is the nurses station, how may I help you?

Greig: Hello, I'm just after my granddaughter Kate. I wanted to see how her little tummy bug is going.

Nurse: She's sleeping at the moment and has had an uneventful night, and sleep is good for her, as we speak. She's been given some fluids to re-hydrate her because she was quite dehydrated when she came in. But she's stable at the moment.

Greig: OK. Well, I'll just feed my little corgis then (barking in the background). So when is a good time to come and visit her? Because I'm the Queen so I'll need a lift down there. Charles! When can you take me to the hospital, Charles?

Christian (pretending to be Prince Charles): When will it be all right to come down and see her? Maybe in the morning or something? If that's OK?

Nurse: I would suggest that any time after nine o'clock would be suitable, because the doctor will be in in the morning and we'll just be getting her freshened up in the morning. I would think any time after nine.

Christian: Wonderful. Is Wills still there or has he gone home? I haven't spoken to him yet.

Nurse: He went home at about half past nine last night. Actually, probably about nine o' clock last night.

Christian: OK, Lovely. But they're all OK, everything's all right?

Nurse: Yes, she's quite stable at the moment. She hasn't had any retching with me since I've been on duty. And she has been sleeping on and off.

Christian: Wonderful.

Nurse: I think it's difficult sleeping in a strange bed as well.

Christian: Yes, of course, it's hardly the palace, is it!

Greig: It's nothing like the palace is it, Charles? Oh, when are you going to walk those bloody corgis?

Christian: Mumsy, I'll go and take the dogs outside.

Greig: I need to go and visit Kate in the morning. My dear, thank you so much.

Nurse: You're very welcome.

Greig: Thank you, bye.

Christian: Goodbye.

(Hangs up)

(Laughter)

Greig: She was giving us real information!

Christian (as Prince Charles): Mumsy, I think that they believed everything we said.

Greig: I am the Queen: bow for me, bow for me.

Christian: Bow for you and your terrible accent.

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