PA
Loose Women star Zoe Tyler has spoken of her heartbreak at not being able to have more children after having her womb removed at the age of 43.
Zoe, who has an 11-year-old son, Jake,from a previous relationship, married Angus Kindley, 52 in 2012.
But she endured a 'year of hell' caused by fibroids on her womb which eventually gave her no choice but to have a hysterectomy four weeks ago.
In an interview with the Mirror, Zoe recounted how she lay on a hospital bed waiting to be anaesthetised four weeks ago, and said to the surgeon: "Please try to save my ovaries if you can."
She recalled: "I don't know why it was so important to me – it just came out of nowhere. Perhaps it was the fear of losing every last bit of my womanhood that did it."
And when she came round after the successful procedure, she remembered feeling ' grateful to be alive'.
"But when I left hospital I couldn't stop my emotions taking over," she said.
"Out of nowhere I just started crying about the fact that I wouldn't be having any more children.
"I didn't think it would affect me like that, but somehow it did. It was so final. My ovaries had been saved so I wouldn't hit the menopause overnight and need HRT, but I would never be a mum again and that was hard.
"I always said that I was done with motherhood after having Jake, but when someone takes the opportunity away from you, it's really tough.
"I had a cry about it but I have to realise that my health comes first. I'm blessed to have the son I have. Jake has been amazing, helping to look after me."
Vocal coach Zoe said she started having symptoms last summer.
She said: "At first it was just heavy periods, which would make me bloat and cause me to feel pain like I'd never known before. Then gradually I started to notice unusual bleeding in between my cycle, which I knew could be a symptom of both ovarian and cervical cancer.
"When I told my husband, Angus, we didn't even need a discussion. We just looked at each other and said, 'It can't be happening again'.
"Angus had lost his first wife to breast cancer and we were worried history was repeating itself. He'd been through the horrors of getting a negative prognosis, the ups and downs of treatment and the final devastation of loss. When I went for that first scan we were both terrified.
"Thankfully, what was found wasn't cancer, but around 20 fibroids – a common problem in women my age. Then I heard that word – 'hysterectomy'.
"At first, I tried to avoid surgery. I stopped taking the pill, which worked to begin with because it altered my hormones. The abnormal bleeding stopped and I was able to carry on with my life.
"But at the end of last year, the doctor suggested that the only solution was to have the op because the fibroids weren't shifting. The doctor told me my womb was far too swollen for keyhole surgery, so I had to prepare for a full intrusive operation.
"I knew I had to bite the bullet, so I cleared my diary and booked myself in. It was terrifying."
Thankfully, Zoe has made a full, albeit uncomfortable, recovery.
She said: "I can now look forward to a new life where the monthly agony and bloating won't be a problem. It has been a long and scary journey and I am still a bit uncomfortable, but I'm here and that's what matters."