The competition is getting tough on Britain and Ireland's Next Top Model. Naturally, it was time to test the contestants with a quiz. Here's Will Gore on episode seven...
TV producers are always looking for a new quiz show format to strike it big - the next Weakest Link or Who Wants to be a Millionaire?
But if the brains behind Britain and Ireland's Next Top Model are hoping that the quiz that made up the opening section of this week's show might form the basis of a money-making spin-off, I suspect they'll be disappointed. It wasn't so much Pointless, as just plain pointless.
The girls split into teams and answered questions fired at them by a fashion journo - Sophie claimed "everybody was having a genuinely good time." I presume she wasn't counting the viewer in this equation.
We had to watch as they struggled to spot that designer and drunken Jew baiter, John Galliano, is one of Britain's top fashion stars, while the name of the high street brand David Beckham modelled y-fronts for also stumped them.
"Sorry Beckham, if you're watching," chirruped Angel, with admirable, if totally misplaced, hopefulness.
Angel was full of one-liners this week. After the prize was revealed to quiz winners, Sophie and Naomi, she exclaimed she was so jealous that her "ovaries popped," and thousands of viewers were simultaneously sick in their mouths.
What was this marvellous prize that had Angel's eggs bursting like balloons in a needle factory? It was – wait for it – a bus ride with a load of the former BINTM contestants with nothing better to do on a Thursday night. Naomi cooed that the "girls were all such inspirational people", and Holly was convinced by the returnees to end her war with fellow Irish girl Sarah.
And so, with spirits high, the wannabe models readied themselves for their next photoshoot. Dannii turned up to explain the theme was 'empowered women' and that their "accessory" would be phobias. In plain English this meant the girls were going to be snapped holding a snake - so if their phobia was snakes they were in trouble, if not they'd be fine.
After the previous few weeks' cow, sheep and pig based shenanigans it seems BINTM is slowly morphing into Animal Hospital. Next week it's rumoured they'll be doing a shoot for a veterinary quarterly. For the photoshoot the models will have to focus on pointing their toes and keeping their eyes alive as they administer lethal injections to a selection of poorly cats.
I jest, of course. This modelling lark is serious and a few of the girls had some big concerns. Emma, my favourite BINTM-er, moaned in the deadpan drawl that has become her trademark: "I got told last time I needed to change my face so I'm a bit anxious about that."
On set, Holly had all sorts of problems. She sat on the snake and her nipples popped out. But that was nothing though compared to Saffron who had to deal with the indignity of being drooled on by her reptilian co-model.
And this proved to be a bad omen as it was she who was handed the portfolio of certain doom back at base. Elle delivered the news with her jacket draped over her shoulders, like a mafia don with fabulous hair.
Saffron committed the crime of being "a pretty girl but not a top model." The fact she had "monotonous hair" also played a large part in her downfall. "I've grown so much in these last eight weeks," she said, fighting back the tears. Unfortunately for Saff, so had her barnet.
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