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Telly Prognosis: Hollywood

16/04/2013 15:52 BST | Updated 15/06/2013 10:12 BST

I am all over Hollywood's bread revolution, like ALL. OVER it.

Until recently I was relatively unacquainted with his animalistic passion. Needless to say he now ROCKS MY WORLD.

Mostly because he really commits to aggression in the kitchen, above and beyond any forerunners like Ramsay.

Example - a dough mix had to be rolled:

A rolling pin, Paul?

Fuck THAT, he screamed, tearing his shirt from his body, all I need are the tools GOD gave me, and began to pummel dough into the solid oak bench with balled fists.

This first episode filled me with excitement. This is what baking is SUPPOSED to be; an outlet for white rage. I've been doing it ALL wrong. I should be ripping out pages of recipe books, shoving them in my mouth and smashing eggs on my forehead.

I tuned in keenly to 'continental breads'. Again, Paul was electric.

My only disappointment came at 'baguette' however, when, at the mixing stage, he submitted to the kitchen aid. Given previous conquers over spoons and whisks, I had expected him to leap two-footed onto the bench, take the bowl roughly and begin combining the mixture with wild abandon using his face.

Despite this fleeting display of weakness, it was a good episode. One of my favourite parts of the programme is when he is given the task of making something for the first time alongside an expert.

We can assume a person that had met him and didn't like him must have proposed this section to the producers.

Seeing him attempting to make an enormous flatbread that came out looking like an omelette from Man vs. Food was excellent viewing. The giant pretzels were even better. Like watching a lion try to fling delicate pastry.

Baking has become too twee - Paul puts that to right . I can't wait for the inevitable on screen fight. Hopefully with his own reflection in the oven door.