Well drop me aaaouuuuuutttttt; Celebrity Big Brother is back to shake off those winter blues, by banishing a bunch of attention hungry stars to a basement to eat left over food and not shower for three days.
It seems Big Brother has gone back to the good old days of dividing the house into rich and poor a la season three with Kate Lawler, which works wonderfully with normal folk, but throw in some pampered people and the game becomes immediately entertaining.
The biggest name in this years house has to be Rylan Clarke; purely because he was sprinkling sequins across our telly boxes a mere month ago. Fellow career flaggers include actress and motorway rumpy pumpy fan Gillian Taylforth, good time girl Tricia Penrose, ex footballer and bum crack flashing fan Neil 'Razor' Ruddock, GG beauty Lacey Banghard, some guy who was in Corrie zillions of years ago, laid back Aussie leg-end Toadey from Neighbours, and reality TV royalty Heidi and Spencer Pratt; oh if only they knew the British meaning behind that word...
As a huge Celebrity Big Brother and reality TV fan, I was very excited to see Speidi enter the house, as back in the Hollywood Hills Spencer is well known for being vindictive, controlling and having a devious streak to rival nasty Nick and his note passing ways.
So far half of the celebs were banished to the basement, and had to eat the leftover food from the luxury house above; while also enjoying Razor's delightful undercrackers and Paula Hamilton's crazy 'I cannot breathe down my left side' trick in the early hours, just so she could sneak off to the warmth above her. Speidi refused to mingle with the other housemates, as apparently Spencer doesn't really like other people and already has it in for Rylan for banishing him and his Barbie-esque wife to the basement.
As with any household, I want to see drama; whether that's Rylan kicking off at Spencer for being totes rude and a right Borelow, Gillian tearing in to Tricia for refusing to make her a cuppa, or Claire from Steps having a typical 'I miss my kids and hubby' meltdown, resulting in an early exit.
My love for the show died off slightly with the move to Channel 5, but anything which involves flash bulb and red carpet-loving humans doing cringeworthy tasks reignites my passion quicker than Mark Wright and a bed full of rose petals.
I'm off to get some beauty sleep, as waking up unable to breathe on my left side doesn't half make me a grumpy girl...Suggest a correction