THE BLOG

My Teenage Diary: Part Two

10/04/2017 14:19 BST | Updated 10/04/2017 14:20 BST

My name is Lucy. I live in London and I'm a Mum of Two. It's 20 years since my 16th birthday and to mark the occasion I have decided to blog a year of my teenage diary.

My blog is a heartfelt tribute to the innocence of youth. At 16 I was an ingenue and a hopeless romantic. I was always in love. I loved with abandon, in great quantities and with huge generosity. But it was always unrequited and boyfriends persistently eluded me. The diary that I turned to so diligently has survived to tell the tale of one teenage girl's attempts to find true love and her place in the world.

PART 2.

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7. I'll take the bad news - 15 November 1997

Dear Diary,

Christ I'm in a bad mood!

Since Fireworks night, I've heard from a few people that Jack might like me after all, so I decided to phone him. I told him that I like him and then I asked him what he thought. He said he'd think about it. It's now been four days since we spoke and NOTHING. Then today, Simon came up to me after school and said that he'd spoken with Jack and did I want the good news or the bad news? I said I didn't want any news as I have to revise for a massive Chemistry test tonight. For God's sake! Clearly it's a NO.

So in summary:

1. I have made a fool of myself

2. I am going to fail my Chemistry test

3. Jack is a wimp for sending Simon as his messenger

I'll write again tomorrow - if I live.

XOXO

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8. Adieu Michael Hutchence, My Celeb Crush - 23 November 1997

Dear Diary,

Michael Hutchence has been found dead in his hotel room in Sydney. I'm in total shock. As you know I massively love him. I'm not obsessed, it's just the kind of typical crush a teenager will have (but I am crazy about him). But how often does your celebrity crush die? I just thought he would be around forever. I feel so sad for him and his family.

I fell in love with Michael Hutchence last year. I know he's a lot older than me but he was so sexy and wild.

Now that he's gone, and so that I never forget, I just want to write down some of the memories that I have.

A record of my love for Michael Hutchence

1. Getting carpet burns on my knees when I fell over, racing into the TV room to video-tape the INXS appearance on Top of the Pops. I cried for AGES when I realised that I'd missed it. The next day I stayed up until 12:30AM to record the re-run

2. Buying the Elegantly Wasted CD, even though I don't own a CD player (and it cost £5)

3. Watching an interview with him on Channel 5 and crying because I couldn't video-tape that channel

4. Receiving the INXS Greatest Hits album for my 16th birthday and LOVING it

5. Coming to school and having History first thing. Meeting Rob on the stairs, who gave me a copy of a magazine with Michael on the cover. I framed the cover and hung it over my bed. It's still there

6. Reading that Michael felt that his first girlfriend was "pivotal" to him. I had never appreciated a word so much, until then

7. Buying four newspapers this morning, with Michael's story (totalling £2.45)

Simon, Henry, Jess, Vicky and Sarah have all called to say sorry etc. Emily has been great too and has really looked after me. My reaction to his death may seem completely dumb - but I really loved him. In a controlled way.

I'll miss you Michael

XOXO

Thanks for reading! Back again next week.

Previously published on www.myteenageself.com/blog