If you have something to say...
Say it on the Huffington Post
If you have something to say...
Say it on the Huffington Post
Speaking for myself, I see women, mothers and feminists as colleagues and friends. We can and should all work together to help dads become better parents and raise the profile of fatherhood. Anti-male blog-posts such as the one written by Louise Pennington create a wedge between the genders.
It might not be a new pair of socks, or even a toolbox, but a 'daddy quota' could be long-lasting and the best Father's Day present he'll ever have. That way dad might even have time to go to Iceland.
I looked up the word 'feckless' in the dictionary this morning because, according to those helpful people at Netmums, us dads are too often unfairly labelled as such. Think peanut-brained Homer Simpson, any hopeless lead character in a soap opera and, my favourite, the wonderfully bemused and put-upon dad in Outnumbered.
When you become a parent your children become the most precious thing you have, and it's natural to want to protect them. But is it possible to be too protective? Is there a link between 'cotton wool kids' and the shortage of practical skills demonstrated by those who want to do apprenticeships or study science and engineering at university? I think there could be.
We've looked at the research about online risks taking the Tanya Byron model created by her in 2008, and mapped that against the parenting response needed to mitigate those risks. Promoting an approach that includes talking to children, setting appropriate boundaries, letting them take managed risks and when it's appropriate using tools and software to back up parents' decisions.
As a proud mother to my young daughter, I can only imagine how difficult it must be for those individuals who struggle to establish a bond with their baby, which is why I jumped at the chance to get involved with the charity as a Trustee.
Childcare professionals and families across the UK breathed a sigh of relief last week following Nick Clegg's decision to block Government plans to increase childcare ratios... Yet whilst the announcement is positive news, there remains a great deal of sector concern around other proposed reforms, which are equally concerning.
Given that couples who share childcare more equally are actually more likely to have happier relationships and are more likely to stay together. We need a broader manifesto about what it ought to mean to be a dad in 21st Century Britain. This would complement - not contradict - the father's rights movement's aims.
What hasn't been discussed though, probably partly because it seems so obvious, is the social structure that is a family. Advocates of 'traditional' marriage have rolled out their favourite phrase, the 'traditional' family, without acknowledging one simple fact; there isn't such a thing.
I've come across so many people in their thirties and forties who are still defined - or at least affected - by their childhood and family experiences. But I'm always mind-blown when I overhear my children slating me or my decisions. My mum and dad did everything deliberately, right?
There is a perceived culture of fear when it comes to parents letting their precious offspring bounce around the Wild West of the internet and our Tomorrow's World of technology. But we've found that the reality is very different.
Seems obvious doesn't it? In fact, kids cost a lot of money to raise, and a major new research study shows that far too many of the poorest children raised in single parent households still don't receive a penny in child maintenance from their child's other parent.
Needless to say, my experience of camp was nothing like Moonrise Kingdom. So where does this distinctive tradition come from and why, historically, do we not practised it in the UK?
As an equal parent in and out of working hours for over five years now, I've realised there's no fairytale quite so engaging, but quite so without actual substance, as the modern fatherhood myth. There's a convincing but untrue story about a huge army of fathers out there across the UK, all merrily doing their fair share of childcare, or maybe even more than their female partners. Just take a look outside. Where are the groups of dads sitting in coffee shops, or joining sing-along at the local library?
Before it was wrong, children often toiled alongside their parents. For their parents. Now we work for them. Like tiny benign overlords they preside over us. Arguably it's better this way. But sometimes, when my toddler rides me like a mule after 12 hours of one-to-one fun, only marginally so.
No one envisages being chronically ill, unable to continue working, and eventually with no alternative, handing in one's notice. To imagine or think for one moment that something positive could possibly come out of this situation is beyond belief.
