Olivia Rose

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New Facebook - a Minefield for Cheaters and an Assault on the Senses

Posted: 22/09/11 11:45

When Google changed and suddenly began predicting what we were going to search for, sometimes before we even knew ourselves, many of us applauded it and told ourselves that this particular new development in the world of technology was useful.

The same can be said for the entire concept of Facebook. An amazing tool to stay connected - all you have to do is login and browse your newsfeed and suddenly you aren't alone anymore. Everyone you ever knew, and their wives are there, nattering away, making you feel like you're part of some new world. A world that exists entirely within your computer screen, or nowadays, smart phone.

To say we are inundated now with communication would be an understatement. Throughout the day, we are assaulted with emails, phone calls, text messages, watsapp, BBM and of course, the old faithful, Facebook. And to be honest, I am one of the addicts, someone who spends all day with the tab open (partly because it makes me feel like I'm not just at work all day and partly because if I don't, my phone bleats constantly with the many 'likes', comments and messages I receive a day).

I know that Facebook can be an incredible tool for connecting people. As a photographer, I have utilised it as a professional tool to find models, assistants, locations etc. In those circumstances, Facebook is good to me. It's like my little friend, I call him 'Facey B.'

But just like all people, Facey B isn't always nice. He has a nasty side to him and hey, although you aren't meant to "shoot the messenger" and all that, Facey B has brought me some of the worst news in my adult life. Seeing the man you love go from 'single' to 'in a relationship' hurts more than a slap on the face. Watching them 'like' someone elses photographs is like a stab to the heart.

Facey B is terrible at keeping secrets. And ever since yesterday, it all got worse. I can't even go into the new top stories feature and for the entirety of yesterday I was battling with bizarre 'top story' choices. Facebook didn't inform me how to change this, so it took a few updates, a few Facebook chat boxes and a knowledgeable friend before I could sort out my news feed. I felt like I had lost control with a relationship that I was perfectly comfortable with.

Suddenly I'm given new features against my will, they've improved something that, as far as I was concerned, didn't need fixing. And with little warning. Or perhaps I was blind to the warning, hoping that it would never really happen. Ignorance is bliss and all that.

There is now an extra bar of information on the right hand side of my screen, constantly updating itself, constantly flickering like a TV playing white noise. Oddly enticing to the eye. I spent the entirety of yesterday not doing work. I just watched that bar update, hypnotised. Most of it is drivel, which was annoying in itself.

Then suddenly I realised that I was seeing things I hadn't seen before... but even as a self proclaimed Facebook stalker (the things you can find out about other peoples lives with a little searching are incredible) I didn't feel excited. I felt dread. Suddenly we cannot post to walls without instantly alerting our Facebook community. Suddenly there are no secrets whatsoever. And suddenly I was scared about how this was actually going to affect my real life. The one that exists outside of Facey B.

Everyone needs secrets, it's how we keep our sense of mystery. It's how we can juggle flirting with Matthew and Michael on the same day whilst we're trying to make our decision about which one is better suited to us. This kind of behaviour has always been around, but before social networking, it was harder to execute... and there was certainly less chance of getting 'caught out.'

With new Facebook bombarding us constantly with information, suddenly what was once a fun way of obtaining a bit of something to chin wag over the coffee table, is a dangerous step in knowing everything about everyone. We all like a bit of gossip, but too much of anything is a bad thing.

For any serial cheaters out there, who deliberately hide their friends list so they can add attractive people a-plenty and flirt via 'poking' or 'liking' or 'wall posting' beware! Your better half will be watching you. And they will know exactly what you're up to, real time.

For me, the most disappointing thing is having my choices taken away. Once upon a time, Facebook was a tool that you could manipulate to show you more or less of what you wanted. Now, it's just gratuitous. Like the people at Facebook are conducting some mass social experiment to see just how much information will send us devoted Facebookers crazy.

They may just have done it this time. Embarrassingly, I cried twice yesterday. Both times, it was because Facey B told me something I didn't want to hear.

 

Follow Olivia Rose on Twitter: www.twitter.com/OliviaRosePhoto

When Google changed and suddenly began predicting what we were going to search for, sometimes before we even knew ourselves, many of us applauded it and told ourselves that this particular new develop...
When Google changed and suddenly began predicting what we were going to search for, sometimes before we even knew ourselves, many of us applauded it and told ourselves that this particular new develop...
 
 
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18:57 on 26/09/2011
I don't tweet and you won't find me on facebook.

When I want information, I'll go to an aggregator (HuffingtonPost, Drudge Report) and then the source, if possible.

People that post true information about themselves on Facebook are darn close to idiot; and there's no reason to read anyone's lies about themselves. What does that leave? It's full of liars or idiots or both at the same time.

A successful business has its own domain and website and does not need Facebook and Gmail.
21:52 on 23/09/2011
Stopped reading at "Facey B"
19:20 on 23/09/2011
Again, why I don't have one of those things.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
jmorgan1981
Veni, Vidi, Vici.
18:57 on 23/09/2011
"i'm appalled that the free service that I am in no way obligated to use keeps making changes that mildly inconvenience me."
17:09 on 23/09/2011
A lot of my friends who were sort of holding out on Google+, or who had signed up but not really used it much yet, have suddenly converted lol Facebook can just keep driving it's people to Google+ :)
06:16 on 23/09/2011
Suddenly my posting from a couple of months ago is appropriate:

The latest Facebook settings open up a new way of playing the social media game.

For a hoot, scroll to the bottom of your FB page where it says in little blue letters, "Do not, repeat, do not go here." Click on it anyway. A page shows up that says "Warning, do not go any further!" Ignore the text and press the small green button on bottom right. A final page comes up with the words, "Too late, sorry." You'll discover your home page has been permanently translated into binary code. What fu010 10111
* * *

FB has created hree new relationship categores:

"Friends who owe me money"
"Friends I owe money to" (not used much), and
"Ex-spouses living within 300 miles of me."
* * *

Do any of us really know what others think of us?

Here's how to find out. Go to the Hypersettings page, select the Ostensible Compliments button and voilà the seemingly nice things people have been posting about you ("like") will be translated into what your "friends" are really thinking ("boring!"). Caution: This setting is not for the thin-skinned.

-From Thinking Out Loud, Feb. 22, http://marperl.blogspot.com/
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realsurfin
Pardon me, can you help out a fellow American
00:27 on 23/09/2011
its not about your enriching your life socially...That part is the lie. Its all about the Benjamins...
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Larry Waters
Bio Your Micro Edit
23:45 on 22/09/2011
Privacy settings, restraint, and common sense, are all you need to keep FB a useful tool for staying in touch with people you know and care about.
17:56 on 22/09/2011
You still have a choice...you can always not use FB and revert back to emails, phone calls, meeting for coffee, and for those friends in out the way places....a letter!!! I received a hand written letter the other day and it was wonderful!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Bertski
just a guy trying not to be part of the problem
13:07 on 22/09/2011
What many people don't realize is that facebook isn't making changes just for the sake of change. Nor are they doing it solely to improve the user experience­. Examine the bulk of their "enhanceme­nts" and you'll see that they enable facebook to capture more and more personal informatio­n about their members - informatio­n that they keep forever and can sell freely to the highest bidder. So, it's not just that all of your facebook friends can see all of your activity in real time - it can be more sinister than that. Understand what happens to the informatio­n you provide, and make intelligent choices about what you share.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
BiggpussJr
The more we divide the more divided we will be..
15:21 on 22/09/2011
lol u hit the nail on the head. face is the new big brother