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Political Correctness Gone Mad

11/04/2013 15:35 BST | Updated 11/06/2013 10:12 BST

Wow! Did you hear about those girl guides? They have voted to support the No More Page 3 campaign by an overwhelming majority of 88%! Dominic Mohan, did you get their letter? Don't you think it's great?

I'm just saying because I know that at the Leveson enquiry you defended Page 3 as the 'representation of youth and freshness' - although to be honest I'm not sure your advisers were careful enough in that choice of words because when they're used to describe a young woman showing her breasts it sounds like a bit of a ... ahem... Jimmy Saville way of seeing things. But anyway, given your support of those qualities you must be pleased about the guides thing. They're a bit youth and freshness aren't they?

It makes you think how great it is that young people can use their voice to stand up to tired old 'British Institutions' that are well past their sell-by date. Girl Power!

I'm hoping you heard what they said anyway. I know you're used to hearing women's views only when they've got their tops off and those views are expressed within a little speech bubble with News in Briefs written at the top. Oh no, hang on a minute, they're YOUR views aren't they? Well, I expect you're pleased to hear the real views of the young women of this country at last.

They make you proud don't they? They've kind of got minds of their own and stuff.

Now what was it they said that I thought was so perceptive. Oh I know.

'The Sun is a family newspaper. Anyone can pick it up, turn to Page 3, and think that it is normal for young women to be treated as objects. This is just wrong. It is impossible to nurture your ambitions if you are constantly told that you aren't the same as your male equivalent. It is disrespectful and embarrassing. We need to get used to the idea that women are not for sale.'

Really well said I think, and I am so thrilled that the No More Page 3 campaign has helped give them a platform to say it.

But did you see Neil Wallis on Channel 5 News the other day? I know he's an ex-Sun editor and doesn't represent your views, but still you must have felt so embarrassed for your newspaper. It was a bit excruciating how he didn't listen to Becky Hewitt who said clearly that the guides had brought up this issue themselves, and how he blustered about 'a bunch of middle class women' being all 'politically correct' and trying to find something to moan about.

And the bit where he thought the views of an old man who still likes to gawp at teenagers' naked breasts were more important than the views of young women who are affected by it!

He's so out of touch isn't he? He just came across as an old sexist dinosaur from the Seventies. Ooh, a bit like Page 3! It did make me think you could really do with some youth and freshness on the team.

So after that very public embarrassment for the Sun, I'm really looking forward to your official response. Your work's cut out there a bit now Dominic, so that you don't look like an out-of-touch sleazy old man too. So let me give you some tips. You need to make yourself look relevant, up to speed with modern Britain. You want to make like you believe in equality and recognise that women are human beings now, not sexual commodities for men. You want to show that you listen to the views of young women even when they've got their tops on.

And a little hint. 'Political correctness'. Look up what it means.