We're sorry, Boots, but this is NOT what our mums want for Mother's Day:

boots mothers day fat control

Also: we realise you might think that nothing says 'I love you, mum!' like condoms and Canesten, but we beg to differ:

boots mothers day

Although presumably that sign was just there to remind you that it's Mother's Day. In an "Ooh, I really need to get some condoms... I don't want a baby... Unlike my mum, who had me... Which reminds me: it's Mother's Day this Sunday!" sort of way.

Of course, condoms are one thing - but if your mum really loves sex, then Boots have got another lovely suggestion:

boots mothers day

Happy Mother's Day, (overweight, horny) ladies of Britain!

Also on HuffPost:

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  • Floral Flourish iPhone Cover

    Nothing wrong with this elegantly styled iPhone cover from <a href="http://www.yoshieandnico.com/122-095-011web-iphone-5-vintage-floral-flourish-fashion-case----flowers.html">Yoshie and Nico</a>, £9.99.

  • Kindle Paperweight

    A fantastic, affordable present for keen readers, £109 -- <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Kindle-Paperwhite-Resolution-Display-Built-/dp/B007OZO03M/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1357920320&sr=8-1">available from Amazon</a>.

  • Full Moon Bathing Set

    A lovely set of essential oils, sea salt soak, hand-made patchouli and vetiver soap, a candle and holder and camomile tea (£40), put together by <a href="http://www.soakyourself.co.uk/products/full-moon-soak">SOAK Yourself</a> -- a recently launched UK-based luxury bathing brand.

  • Rooster Tablemat

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  • Calissa Eye Mask

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  • Chocolate Pizza

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  • Ethical Heart Earrings

    There are some present gems in Arabel Lebrusan's collection of ethical jewellery. These <a href="http://www.arabellebrusan.com/collections/earrings/products/heart-filigree-earrings-rose-gold">Heart Filigree earrings</a> in rose (£90), are made using 100% recycled silver.

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  • Herb Labels

    This pretty set of Herb Labels, made by Timea Sido, are just £12 from <a href="http://www.seekandadore.com/c/0/p/set-of-3-herb-labels/793.aspx">Seek And Adore</a>.

  • Spices Grow Box

    A great addition to any kitchen.. whether your mum likes to cook or not! The <a href="http://www.johnlewis.com/kew-gardens-world-spices-grow-box/p231801553">Kew Gardens World Spices Grow Box</a> is £15.

  • PiP Studio Teapot

    A fresh and modern reworking of the classic English teapot from <a href="http://www.johnlewis.com/pip-studio-teapot-blue/p231081220">John Lewis</a> (£39).

  • Vintage Tweezerit

    These <a href="http://www.tweezerit.co.uk/vintage/">vintage-look tweezers</a> are just £21.49 each.

  • Primrose Yellow Jug

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  • Clarissa Hulse Glasses Case

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  • Sapphire Satchel

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  • Mother's Day Cake Tin

    Treat mum to some beautiful blooms from <a href="http://www.marksandspencer.com/">Marks & Spencer</a> this year with a <a href="http://www.marksandspencer.com/Marks-and-Spencer-Mothers-Cake/dp/B00BA1F5US?intid=md_car_4_1">cake tin display</a> that includes a gorgeous arrangement of cerise germini, purple carnations, white freesias, orion eryngium, ruscus and white roses (£50).

  • Vinopolis

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  • Body and Soul Gift Set

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  • Cotswold Perfumery Training Courses

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  • Ted Baker Scarf

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  • Womens Touch Trainer Heart Rate Monitor

    If your mum is keen to get into better shape, this monitor could be the perfect present (£94.99). The <a href="http://uk.oregonscientific.com/cat-Sports-and-Health-sub-Heart-Rate-Monitors-prod-Womens-Touch-Trainer-Heart-Rate-Monitor---Grey.html#.UKz30-OTtc8">Womens Touch Trainer Heart Rate Monitor</a> measures calorie and fat percentage burned, allowing users to efficiently exercise and reach their desired weight-loss goals.

  • Hunter Dunn iPad Cover

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  • Aquabourne Waterproof Amazon Kindle Case

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  • iGloves Touchscreen

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  • Leather iPad Cover

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  • British Museum Merino Wool Laptop Cover

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  • Jambox Speaker

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  • Vintage DAB Roberts Radio

    This stunning <a href="http://www.johnlewis.com/231323435/Product.aspx?s_pccid=pc_gs__&">radio</a> blends retro leather and wooden effect side panels to create the illusion of 50s chic... without the bother of old-fashioned technology.