Unless you’re a property mogul or have some sort of Margaret Thatcher-esque arrangement with the Ritz, look away now.
Because the clever yet fiendishly cruel bods at Thrillist have joined forces with property website Find Properly to produce a London Underground rent map.
Yes, that’s a map of the capital’s transport network showing just how much renting at each stop will cost you per month. Or in a nutshell, just how unlikely you are to ever find that adorable, affordable pied-à-terre in Hyde Park Corner.
Click here to view a zoomable version of the map
The figures reflect the cost of a one-bedroom property within a kilometer of each Tube station on the network (but not the Circle Line because as Thrillist points out ‘literally every station is present on another line.’)
While it’s no surprise that prices increase the closer you get to the centre of London, it’s an intriguing map nevertheless – only £1,260 for Kew Gardens, really?
You can expand your search (and general sense of masochism) on the Find Properly site which allows you to increase the number of bedrooms and intriguingly allows you to view the map in the form of Harry Beck's 1933 template or a geographically accurate version.
Find Properly allows you to search using Harry Beck's 1933 template of the London Underground map, or an unofficial, geographically accurate version
Speaking of which, an official geographically accurate map was recently prised from the clutches of Transport for London, via a Freedom of Information request.
Abandoning the classic straight lines and sharp angles as etched by electrical draughtsman Beck, the official map is a pleasingly cluttered mass of knots and curves.
Keep scrolling for close-ups of Thrillist's London Rent Map.
This is how London's complex transport network really winds its way around the city
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