THE BLOG

The Intimate Combination Of Anxiety And Accepting I Had Cancer, At 19

08/03/2017 12:31 GMT | Updated 21/03/2017 09:51 GMT
bennyartist via Getty Images

Firstly, and mainly, being diagnosed is a very hard process to fully accept. Once this is done, it is easy to move on with your life, enjoy life and make friends again.

Without accepting what has fully happen to me, I have not been able to live life for the past 7 months. This is a very strange concept to go through. Here is why.

The honeymoon 'period' of chemotherapy is over, as I only had treatment for six months which is a short cycle (6 cycles). Therefore having my power port removed is incredibly difficult. For me, this procedure invoked many panic attacks.

The main thing to process when going through a diagnosis like this is to accept that firstly, if you have cancer/tumour/mass.. you are not going to die. This may sound extremely dramatic. However, being so young, this is so important.

Meeting my diagnosis so intensely head on was a mistake, and I understand that now. At the time I did not. Once my diagnosis was officially given to me by my doctor, Prof G., I threw myself into chemotherapy without a second thought.

As an example, the long wait exacerbated the treatment so much. I had symptoms pointing toward something serious, not necessary cancer, all year - almost two.. without taking them seriously. like costochrondritis (feeling tightness in your chest)/pneumonia.

Secondly, my personal biopsies were so difficult and the mental effect that had on me where not considered to myself. My family and close friends couldn't point it out to me as I was acting so brave, yet a bit broken inside.

Have chemo, depending on your regimen, does not just affect the single area of a tumour or mass. Mine was in my chest and a bit in my spleen. Chemo treatment affects the entire organs, mainly the immune system.

Please look out for Blog number 2; Chemo days vs no chemo days (posting in 2 weeks time) on http://florence.hastings1.wixmysite.com

OR (if you are currently being diagnoised, whatever age with cancer) watch this video from the Macmillan Cancer Trust:

http://www.macmillan.org.uk/get-involved/campaigns/money-and-cancer?origin=hp-2017

​​