Great excitement! The new rules on drinking from The Department for Health have inadvertently drawn me into the BBC Breakfast studio to talk to my mates Sian and Bill.
Women should not regularly drink more than two to three units a day (one glorious alcopop) and lucky men should not regularly drink more than three to four units a day (two cans of cider). Apparently the old rules were deemed unclear so lots of MPs assembled (over a nice glass of wine very possibly) to draw up some new rules.
We start our interview with a shamefaced apology about the last time I was on the BBC sofa - ostensibly to plug a play I was in - but due to my hangover, I wasn't too focussed which was then written about in The Guardian.
I'm on with a dashing doctor from Kings who sees a lot of liver damage in the young -so together we must strike a balance over liver damage and comfy drinking (lots in my case).
I meet dashing MP Chris Bryant in the green room who assures me the glass size in the House of Commons is the same size as normal. I challenge him to buy me one on that terrace I see from atop a bus on Westminster Bridge. He offers. I accept. What to wear?
To get the 70 quid's worth of me I then get kidnapped off to Radio Five Live where I talk down the line to Nicky Campbell who's already installed in the Manchester new super duper BBC dome. A very serious man is on with me who shrieks we have the RIGHT TO INFORMATION.
I almost say "calm down dear" I know we do - but we also have the right to nice home poured g & t when we want it...
No sooner do I get home I get another call from a gentleman at BBC World at One - he asks me to summarise the facts of the official advice and measurements but with an humorous twist if you please. I dash off a piece in 20 mins and before I've got time to change out of my leisure pants a radio car is outside to record me. (All because I haven't yet dared utilise my new iPad).
I stumble over some statistics which they kept in but they cut the jokes. Never mind - drinking is a serious business that's why you have to keep at it.
BBC World at One - (I'm on at the end of the programme)
Might be on PM and all.
Cheers!