THE BLOG

Why Do I Share My Grief?

15/08/2013 20:54 BST | Updated 15/10/2013 10:12 BST

What do I get from writing a blog about the loss of my wife? One could question why a person would want to expose themselves and discuss their feelings so deeply, but it has been one of the most healing things I could ever imagine doing, and here's why.

Each time I write I just type. The words come of their own accord but as they do it forces me to articulate the whirling mess that is going on in my head. When I start writing I have no idea where I'm going, but as I write things begin to make sense, things take shape and sense is made.

More recently, as the blog is becoming more widely read I'm having more and more people contact me with their own heartbreaking stories.

I've had e-mails from people whose parents were taken in Iraq when they were young children, tortured and held in prison for years with no apparent reason.

People have written to me that have lost both parents and then a sibling all within the space of six months only to find that their partner was also having an affair.

Another person told me of their continuing financial worries and how they are likely to be going bankrupt once again.

What is striking is that I've known all of these people for years professionally, but never knew the turmoil that was going on in their lives in the background.

So it forces me to stop and think, it's not just me that goes through horrendous times in life, it's not just me that is suffering, many people go through awful times but just don't tell anyone. They suffer in silence, keeping it to themselves.

I've come to realise over the past few weeks that those people that I held up to be perfect, in high esteem in my business life, those people that I thought were invincible and had everything positive in their lives have actually had just as much grief as me.

And that makes me feel normal again, having communication with other people that have been through equally tough times lets me know that this IS life. THIS IS IT. I haven't been singled out to be punished, this is just normal life that happens to so many people, and knowing that gives me strength.

I just wonder how many more people out there have had equally difficult times in their lives but have never told anyone, how many more people could be drawing strength from one another if only they would share, I wonder?

You can read my blog here.