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'Big Brother: Timebomb' - Week One Review

18/05/2015 22:28 BST | Updated 18/05/2016 10:59 BST

In the 16 years Big Brother has run, last year was the first launch night I missed. As a result of being a housemate this time last year, I missed the pleasure of sitting back and enjoying the show through a super-fan's eyes. Now that the first civilian series has aired since mine, I must admit how good it is to watch my favourite show again without any emotional strings attached. Five days into Big Brother: Timebomb, I'm feeling very excited about this series.

Rather than a two night launch, we saw 16 housemates rushed in the house back-to-back launch night. Not even having the chance to remember their names, decide who I loved or loathed, or make predictions as to who will go far and who will get the boot early, Big Brother pulled their most shocking launch night twist straight out the bag and only evicted someone right away. Fortunately for the viewers, first evictee 46-year-old Simon Gross was as irritating as piles and would have been an early goer anyway, therefore Big Brother's stunt certainly paid off by demonstrating that they will forever surpass viewers expectations.

On this year's line-up, there are a number of archetypical characters which I have no time for including bimbo twins Amy and Sally, obnoxious ladette Chloe, and vacuous man-whore and alleged fame-whore Danny. Although there are few I am not yet fond of, I have certainly formed an opinion of most others.

Mancunian law student Sarah walked in as this year's self-proclaimed token-bitch, already dirtying her hands by starting disputes straight away. I'd expect her to be bright enough to realise that she has no pass to the final to fall back on and playing up to an abrasive "tell it like it is" persona won't get her far. If she's up for nomination this week, my bets are on Sarah to be the first housemate voted out.

Several of the other girls have also intrigued me since their entrance. Irish model, Jade comes off as an intellectual girl with a dark side that I can see surfacing soon. So far we've merely seen her repetitively discuss her polygamous lifestyle choice and justify to the others that she is an effective glorified slut. I like Jade, but I'm hoping we see more to her character outside of her sexuality.

On topic of repetition, we've also come to learn of Adjoa's fondness of cunnilingus. With the absence of any lesbian housemates over the last few years, Big Brother has given much attention to their first homosexual female cast in a while. As an attractive "lipstick" lesbian who breaks the stereotypical mould, I find her an interesting character to watch. Adjoa has also expressed that she's a pastor's daughter and "lover of Jesus". Hopefully she stop using the word "pussy" every five minutes so Jesus can love her back.

This year's male housemates seem to have taken a secondary role so far. Aaron emerged as a foreseeable favourite to viewers over the first few days; however his forced attempts to deliver all come across self obsessed. Already we have seen him play a narrator role in the diary room, back seat observer amongst the others, have drunken play-fights and trivial confrontations. I see Aaron burning out and becoming too polarising with viewers quick in.

As always, Big Brother finds a male cast with nothing more to offer than a decent torso for the ladies to look at. This years, is an aspiring rapper Christian. Automatically, I disapprove this sort given if it weren't for their looks they wouldn't even pass the first round of auditions. Surprisingly, rather than taking an alpha male role, we've already seen him become isolated and show a vulnerability to being "misunderstood" by the others. I am hoping that Christian is evicted early for his overly high self-opinion rather than pitied by a sympathetic audience that wouldn't give the time for him, if he didn't have a nice six-pack and puppy dog eyes for the sixteen year old fan girls to pander to.

Despite receiving an influx of tweets claiming that he is this year's me, my favourite so far is Nick. Admittedly, I do feel I am looking into the mirror when I watch his willowy mannerisms and nervous disposition, whilst listening to his posh Hertfordshire accent. However, despite my similarities with him, I have a soft spot for his vulnerability and am actually endeared by his gentle nature and self-revelations of insecurity rather than put off. I doubt that Nick will grow into the strong panto-villain that his VT portrays him to want to be, but I think he could go far in the series.

Without touching on Friday nights twist too dramatically. I'm confident to say Pie Face WILL regret turning down the car for his place in the house. If I were in his position I would have probably also turned it down four days in as the experience to many is completely priceless and one that after a large build up, would seem irrational giving up. No money is made from Big Brother and once Jack does return to normality and his job in McDonald's, he will realise that £27,000 would have been a huge starting point in his life towards building a future, especially after his short stint on Big Brother does not resolve his quarter life crisis. Although I respect his decision to stay inside the Big Brother house and make the most of his experience, he will not win. Early favourites always fade away and as the show continues on I contemplate whether he will bring enough to the show in order for the public to reward him with the win.